More aimless gesture politics
Advertising a ‘get you to the UK' smuggling operation will become a criminal offence. So will supplying boats & other kit required by the people smugglers.
   But as these things take place abroad, any legislation for the UK will be irrelevant. No one surprised.

Q: Why is Labour so hell-bent on destroying small businesses?
A: Because so few of its stooges have ever held a proper job and they have no idea of the conditions needed for small businesses to thrive and make the country thrive.

The Bonk of England's decision not to cut the base rate; currently stuck @ of 5.25%; is being blamed on the hotel industry jacking up prices by 8.8% in May & June to take advantage of major music events, e.g. that of T. Swift, and preventing a further fall in the inflation rate.
Ironmongers & supermarkets have noted a surge in purchases of ordinary wax candles. That's the ones used for illumination rather than the ones that emit a weird celebrity pong.
This is being interpreted as an index of the nation's confidence in Labour's ability to keep the lights on when their overpriced Milipede occasionals let us down.

The Democraps in California are under the thumb of the transpicaters and driving out major businesses, including those of Marsman Musk. ‘Go woke, go broke' in action.

Worst of both worlds
Bier O'Tool's flagship election pledge, forming GB Energy, will take at least a decade to deliver, the Xperts have concluded. Worse, it will be largely irrelevant to the needs of both the nation and the climate criminals' agenda!
The fatal flaw is that Labour wants to punish energy companies with a stonking windfall tax whilst Xpecting those same companies to cough up investment capital for GB Energy to splurge. After taking its cut off the top, of course. And GBE won't have anything to do with making sure that UK households are supplied with energy.
“Sounds like the Bier gang is as good at not building things as the SNP is @ not building the ferries Scotland's islands need to desperately.” Callum Mac
“Not just Lies From Labour, prethetic ones to boot. GB Energy is just another layer of useless burrocrazy.” Sheridan Stinth

Labour Inaction, Yakketer, Yakketer
Asian thugs attack police officers at Manchester Airport, breaking the nose of one of them. The cosmetic mayor & police commissioner, Jonah Burnham, makes vague noises & does nothing. No one surprised.
   The BBC was just as bad. Only the retaliation, nothing about what led up to it.
“Are we Xpected to believe that only thug lives matter in Greater Manchester?” Brew Slee

The Home Office wants to see an end to dangerous channel crossings. Which means what? Sending the Border Farce taxi service all the way to the French coast?

WEEK 4    Change? Change? Aren't things bad enuff as they are?

 
Joe Won’t Go!
The more the Democraps demand that President Joke Biden goes into retirement, the more stubborn he gets. If it's ‘Hell, no, I won't go voluntarily', the Democraps will just have to bite the bullet and give him the push. Time is not on their side.

Exit Joe News
Creaky Joe has been made to see sense. He is no longer pretending that he's good for four more years.
There is some agitation for his wife, Jill Biden, to be charged with felony pensioner abuse for not letting him retire gracefully when he needed to, which would have saved a whole heap of embarrassment.
Joe was confirming his creakiness by offering his useless VP, Kamel A. Harrissment, as a sub. Nett Zero enthusiasm for that from the Democraps.
The Democraps are now getting a booting for forcing poor old Joe to stay in office way past the limit of his competence. And so are the meeja vultures, who lied & lied like members of the O'Tool Gang and assured the American public that Joe was 100% and doing great.
   Cue a chorus of "Lying bastards!" clap-clap, clap, clap-clap.

Today’s Question:
Has anyone ever crawled into the job of prime monster trailing Xpectations lower than those we have for self-confessed tool Bier Smarmer? Not in this country, is the best response we can come up with.
“Our lighting poll has come up with the conclusion that he is a leg of unique deadness, as far as prime monsters go. Previous incumbents have arrived with some expectation of competence, which they have proceeded, in the main, to dispel in their own time.
   “Our war-mongering friend t.b. liar is a prime recent Xample of this. But as Beer's sole [or even sold? Ed.] qualification for office is not being the Tories, as for the rest of his sorry crew, Nett Zero is the starting point on the Xpectations front.” Cary Elvis
“Which means he could surprise us all by being the GOAT. But only a totally drunken idiot would put his own money on that!” Eve Hoe

Young persons used as staff members at an event have to be issued with a clip-on bow tie as they have never learnt how to tie a proper tie.

Closing Week 7 with the Lions in Calgary
Defences ruled to start but the Lions opened the scoring with a TD in the 11th minute of Q1. The Stampeders began Q2 with a great punt return, on to the BC 9, TD pass by Maier, 7-all.
   The Stamps needed a review to get a sideline TD reception in the BC end zone in the 13th minute for 7-14. BC dashed down the field; to a FG, 10-14. They had time to get close again but Adams was picked off by the Stamps.
   The Stamps kicked a FG 3 minutes in to Q3, 10-17. BC got close again, TD half-way through the quarter, 17-all. The Stamps were stuffed at the end of Q3 going for a 3rd & goal from the BC 2.
   BC gave up a safety to start Q4, 17-19. A FG in the 5th minute put BC 20-19 ahead. The Stamps rushed to the BC 5, TD, no +2, 20-25. BC kicked a FG in the 9th minute, 23-25. BC was stopped by a pick. A punt with a couple of minutes left gave them a rouge. A fumble by the Stamps was fumbled back to them! And they were able to run out the clock. 24-25 final. Phew!

The global IT outrage is being used as an Xcuse for not doing all sorts of stuff—as a veritable skivers' charter!

O'Tool's spy, Sugar Ray, is up to her neck in the first major scandal of his period in office—meddling in a white elephant stadium project in Ulster. £310 million involved; or is it £400 million?
Edstone Milipede's plan to cover prime agricultural land with solar panels will cancel the UK's domestic food security and force us to import from abroad; which will increase global carbon emissions. No one surprised.
Bier O'Tool is taking his life in his hands by freezing out his deputy, Angrier Raygun. But there is a suspicion that Wee Streeting, Reevesie & Edstone are overflowing his quota of madcaps & including Angrier would lead to a meltdown.

Q: What is behind Bier O'Tool's plan to renationalize the railways by not renewing private franchises when they Xpire?
A: Using them will cost travellers a lot more due to staff getting higher wages & paying more in union dues, and the unions will be able to bung more cash to the Labour party.
Q: Should be good business for the coach trade?
A: Until O'Tool nationalizes it.
“It's a typical Labour plan for the railways—to uncouple revenue from customers & the costs of the ‘service' to allow wages to soar and union contributions to Labour funds to do the same.” Eric Python

More of that Nett Zero stuff
Dave the Playboy Lammy, the current sub for a Foreign Sec., seems to be collecting the most lack of competence flak. But it's a close-run thing. Telling Israel & the Hamas to stop shooting up Gaza on a jolly to Palestine was a good source of boos.
“Basically, we knew he'd be crap right from the start and he never did anything to prove us wrong? Is this supposed to be a recommendation on the grounds of consistency?” Poppy White

Bier O'Tool refuses to apologize for demanding that foreign criminals should not be be deported from the UK when he was making money out of it. Soft on letting criminals in, even softer on kicking them out.
“Just what is he getting out of making the UK as safe haven for the worst foreign criminals available? A twisted sense of payback on the nation?” Jaffa Kree

Out of sight, never mind or
Dirty solar = Dirty Rat
Edstone Milipede is getting a booting for his plan to cancel farmland & cover it with solar panels made by what amounts to slave labour using the unloved Uigurs in the north of China. That's kit transported here with a HUGE increase in carbon emissions.
   That's on top of the booting he's getting for destroying the enviromint just because Bier O'Tool is letting him.
Edstone is still pretending there is no need to solve the problem of intermittency—that's times when the wind don't blow & the sun don't shine & occasionals like wind & solar contribute less than 2% of the UK's energy requirements.
Milipede keeps on repeating the lie that energy bills will drop by £300/year, not soar. No one surprised.
“I suppose it saves a bit of time if you choose not to take any notice of what Labour politicians say ‘coz you know they're just going to lie to you.” I.M. Plode
“Beer O'Tool is to give Africa £84 MILLION of our money and pretend it will stop migrants from ending up here? Who the bloody hell does he think he is? Gordon F. Broon? No mates here so he's going to try to buy some in Africa with our bleedin' cash.” Grav I. Etron

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The more you draw parallels with the culture of evil certainty in their infallibility @ the Post Office when the Horizon Horror was being allowed to happen, the more likely it looks that Lucy Letby was framed by ‘experts' with Horizon-equivalent Xpertise, and the more truth & justice recede ever further into the distance.
“The rule for Those People seems to be first do as much evil as you can, then tack on a bit more for good measure.” Omega O'Mikron
Xperts are now leaping out of the woodwork to claim that the 'evidence' that 'proves' Letby is innocent also proves she's as guilty as Hell. Arthur Clarke's Fourth Law in action again.

Putinstan is so desperate for cannon fodder that wounded troops are being sent right back into the firing line in Ukraine to keep up the illusion that Putin the Poisoner has a truly enormous army and the casualty rate is of no consequence.

Fair's fair—Wee Streeting is doing the right thing by not binning the Tory ban on giving dangerous drugs to gender-confused kiddies, even if it upsets Labour's Transpicators.
“Shame that Wee is having to put up with his craw-sticker of having to embrace a Tory policy that Labour opposed just because the Tories came up with it.” Ins Urgent

The police in Derbyshire are getting both approving pats on the head and boots up the bum for parading around in a borrowed tractor with police livery and flashing lights.
   It's part of an initiative to engage with people and tell them how to protect their property. Something which police farces have not been arsed to do more or less everywhere more or less forever.

Young people have decided that what they need in their lives is more adventure. And their adventure of choice is to ignore the disapproval of their elders and . . . take up smoking.
   Particularly in the Untied States.
   It's their way of staging a revolution against being nanny'd.

More pointless pillockry
The EFU will make arrivals from the UK stand in a queue, being messed about pointlessly, for four times longer from October. It's all part of the Brexit revenge campaign.
   Infrastructure is required for getting the biometric data that will be required under the new system and the EFU is doing routine foot-dragging over getting it installed.
“Looks like another Xcellent reason for giving Yourope a miss.” Fred Bludger

One way to do it
Italian astronomers reckon they have found a good place for settlers to park on the Moon. It's well shielded from radiation & meteorites, and it has an average temperature of 17 deg.C.
   Not much of a view, though, if the base would have to be 400-550 feet down a lava tube created by an Xtinct volcano.

The Science Museum's bosses are not doing anything for its reputation as a home of science by banning sponsorship from energy firms to do meaningless virtue-flagging. That's on top of all the slavery garbage.
MicroSoft is blaming ignorant interference by the EFU for causing the global outrage. Given the in-built uselessness of the EFU, the claim has a high level of likelihood.

Bier O'Tool is planning to ‘take the brakes off Britain'. Which can lead only to a MASSIVE motorway-style pile-up and total ruin.
   But hey, that's Labour's way.

The Welsh Ssennedd will end up blowing £40 MILLION on imposing & scrapping its stoopid 20 mph speed limit.

“Lying bastards!”
Is there some sort of personality defect involved which gives people who join the Labour party a twisted thrill when they repeat what they—and everyone else listening—know to be a blatant lie?
   That's the only Xplanation on offer for Labour's Treasury & other stooges ignoring official figures showing that the economy is in better shape now than it was when Brown Labour was booted out of office in 2010.

One of them there studies has concluded that 133,000 blokes choose to ignore the NHS and die earlier than they could have every years because there's not that much worth living for, as far as they are concerned.
   This number is expected to increase relentlessly over the next 5 years.

Save The Planet & Save Yourself!!
Our paper towels and boggo rollos are GUARANTEED gluten-free!
Special bulk deals available.
Romiley Pharma Megastore, 113/5 Riverside Drive

Teenagers are officially classed as junk food addicts now that they get two-thirds of their daily calorie intake from ultra-processed foods rather than from real grub.

Q: Wee Tabix; any relation to Streeting?
A: Very distant if any as Tabix serve a useful purpose (dietary).

Bier O'Tool claimed he wants to unlock growth & take the brakes off Britain. Alas, his plan to remove the brakes will also include the wheels coming off too and the hulk created won't be going anywhere at all.
Serbia O'Tool has opened the floodgates for disaster, according to the mega-successful founder of Pimlico Plumbers. But as this is what Labour always does, no one surprised.
Bier O'Tool was been forced to bin votes for 16-year-olds after being told that most of them won't vote Labour as he's too dull for them. They are more likely to go for someone with a bit of life in him, like Mr. Farage from the garage.

Joe Noos
Creaky Joe, it is being revealed, was just putty in the hands of the liberal establishment in the Untied States. Their Blob has nothing but contempt for the truth. As for the Blob here.
The race is on to mess with the time period when Creaky Joe was incompetent. Has it been years or just months? Or can The US Blob get it down to about 10 minutes?

Just don’t call it an amnesty, even if it is
Our current Home Sec., Pixie Balls-Cooper, the Syrian refugee's sometime friend, is going to let the system grant asylum here to most of the illegals scheduled for a trip to Rwanda. So that's 70,000 to 90,000 more homes for Bier O'Tool to build.

WEEK 1    “If you want BS, vote for him! He’s full of it!”

 
Death Doctors’ Strike 11, Day Five
Yawn. Is it over yet?
We're all ready for a long summer holiday now.

Any old Xcuse for mischief
The lunatic Left are trying to get milk cancelled for being rachelist; using funding from the government. Their story is that some populations outside Yourope & North America are lactose intolerant, and if they can't drink milk, no one should because it's flaunting white supremacy.
   Just tea with lemon in future. Or tea with jam if you're from Putinstan.
“So they'll get the Supreme Court to ban the milk industry? If Labour's layabouts don't collapse the UK dairy farming industry first?” Justice Luck

 
Happy Canada Day!

Week 4 ended in the nation’s capital
The TigerCats visited the RedBlacks, who fumbled away the opening kick off! TD from it. A Charge! from the Hamilton 1 scored a TD but the PAT try missed. 7-6.
   Ward managed to ding a FG through off the upright, 7-9. One for the Cats a minute in to Q2, 10-9. Lotz of defence until the RBs went ahead with a FG in the last minute of the half, 10-12.
   A FG 3 minutes into Q3 put the Cats 13-12 up. The Cats dropped a pick chance, defences ruled into Q4. Another FG, 16-12. Boot by the RBs in the 4th minute, 16-15. The RBs reached the TC 15, TD with 2 minutes left, no +2, 16-21.
   The Cats got to the RB 4 in the last minute, TD, no +2, 22-21. Time enuff for a 45-yard FG from Ward for a 22-24 walk off win for the RedBlacks.

“What are the barmy bikers doing, going Autour de France? Don't they know there's a war on?” Nottak Lue
[Ukraine is probably far enuff away from France; or Spain; for the bikers to be safe. Ed.]

A minor interest Euros football match last Friday got over twice the TV audience that the final argy bargy session between the SnackStabber & BS managed.

The Organization for Economic Catastrophe & Destruction [OECD, foreign] is attributing the UK's low fertility rate to Brexit, to no one's surprise. But it's also failing to Xplain the low fertility rates in Europe. Unless Brexit is going to get the blame for that as well.

How desperate can you get? BS is letting Bollocks to Berko, who was ditched by Labour for his bullying, do campaign door-stepping on behalf of the party. O.J. Corbynstein next? Or Abbaccuss Abbott?

The EFU is hoping for a €35 BILLION boost to its budget if it can stick a 10% of turnover fine on Apple for an anti-competitive phone crApp policy.

Evil? Irrelevant? Vexatious?
The BMA has been taken over by fans of the Hamas and any doctor foolish enuff to admit to being Jewish when addressing the annual conference gets a good dose of heckling and abuse.
   Quite why a Britisch trade union for doctors wants to waste 10% of its conference time on pointless rows about the Middle East, knowing that no one there is listening, has not been Xplained.
“Maybe the BierBC needs to set its throttlebottom interviewer, Nicro Binbag, on them. It would certainly dilute the tedious political argy-bargy over nothing ishues if nothing else.” M.T. Skye
“Is that BS sussed? He's trying to make the election stuff about nothing ishues because he doesn't have a clue how to tackle anything that matters?” Igor Putanikov

Death Doctors’ Strike 11, Day Six
"Wasn't it only supposed to be 5 days?"
"What the hell. Make the punters suffer. That's what BS would do."

Ineffective tactic
Barcelona is leading Catalonia's charge in the Spanish campaign to stop diluting communities with properties rented out to pesky tourists.
   But is adding a massive £2.78 per night to a visitor's bill any sort of realistic incentive to go somewhere else?

“You'd never know there's a general election campaign going on around us. Nett Zero posters on show in the gardens in middle of Romiley village.” A.L.M.

ENRICH (v) to make wealthier
DERICH (v) what a Labour government does [except for its mates. Ed.]

Some Xperts think tattoos cause lymphoma, a form of blood cancer. But hey, think up any medical proposition and you will be able to find at least one Xpert who thinks it's ‘could' or even ‘downright definite'.

Q: Didn't you once have a lot to say about some hippocritical nutter called gbl?
A: He's been cancelled, so we don't have to bother any more.
Q: Why does the government's accountancy dept. keep changing its numbers for what the economy is doing?
A: Because they rush to offer a ‘think of a number' guess before they have the data to do a realistic calculation.

There is still no escape
The Office for Notional Sadistics has grotted all over the Labour lie that the Tories crashed the economy. We've done better than our major rivals on the Continent since we binned corrupt new labour in 2010 and only France has done a little bit better than us since Brexit.
The economy is in good health and the only drag on our prosperity is the debt Brown Hole dug by the last Labour government & Gordon F. Broon.
The wonkiest election tale of the moment is that O.J. Corbynstein supporters in Islington are too iggorant to know that he's been booted out of the Labour party and they'll put their cross in the box where they see Labour rather than the box with Corby's name in it.
Bad news for the Pal Pals. Bier Smarmer won't recognize their Palestinian state to avoid upsetting the regime in the Untied States, which is agin it.

Today’s Heads Up:
If you start from the realization that Bier Smarmer has as much compassion & humanity as Putin the Poisoner, you soon see what he's all about.

When in doubt, burn them out!
In Kenya, they set the parliament building on fire in protest against Xcessive taxes. A busy time in store for London's fire brigade when Smarmer's Army gets to the serious pick-pocketing?
“Not so much Smarmer's Army as a gang of revolting peasants, all wanting to go their own way. And fill their pockets, of course.” T. Rubble
“Especially if they pander to the lake-shitters and similar blots on the landscape when trying to hoover up votes.” 4 Reigners

Wiltshire Police are in trouble for pandering to a male rapist who is now claiming to be female. No one surprised.

Reality Postponement
The rise in wealth & prosperity over the last 3 years, following the containment of the Chinese plague has led to a 57% rise in the number of women who admit doing binge-drinking.
   The Xperts are now eagerly awaiting further data to find out if Labour-imposed austerity reduces the trend, or more women become prepared to sacrifice basics to escape into o'blivion in a Labour paradise.

The Director General of the UN's offshoot the World Health Organization is in favour of building a healthier & more equitable society. Which puts him among the opposition to the Smarmer Army.

In the event of a Labour landslide, as predicted by the wise guys, the Tories should just defend those constituencies which stayed loyal in 2024 come the 2029 general election, and continue in the role of constituency representatives only.
   Their message to the nation in 2029 should be: "You voted for these idiots to punish us. Now keep on living with them and be punished yourselves."

Take the money and . . . nothing
The current national lottery operator, an outfit called AllWyn, is adopting an all-lose attitude to customers who failed to buy their ticket online. Those who use a shop or a Post Office have to put up with AllWyn holding back the cash & not letting them get any interest on their win for up to 9 weeks.
   The punters also beef about AllLose lying like a Smarmer to mugs who ring the unhelp phone line.

Today’s Question:
Is it true that the supplements for veganists include insufferability pills?

Q: Is O.J. Corbynstein the bee's knees?
A: In 2019/2022: Oh, yes. He'd be a wonderful prime monster. And he's my best mate.
A: In 2024: Oh, no. And anyone who thinks I ever said that is lying. I couldn't wait to stab the old git in the back and grab his job.
Q: Someone who is Lumpenproletariat?
A: Someone who is certainly a lump—a particularly clueless one—and has a strong inclination to identified as a prole.
Q: Does that sound like BS? That's Bier Smarmer, by the way, not the cattle product.
A: Doesn't it just.

The UK's debt Brown Hole will be £4,000 BILLION by 2030 if Labour's lunatic greenwashing & Nett Zero scams are allowed to go ahead.
   This comes from a leak of a confession by the Labour bloke in charge of BS's green BS.

No wonder they’re reviled as libel lounges
X-Witter has slumped into the pocket of the transpicater lobby and is now being accused of cancelling every account which fails to grovel before them.

Some tedium relief
A Reform candidate for Southend East is doing his best to wind up the po-faced mob by being outrageous over migrants.
   Machine gun posts to take out the boats on arrival, and the Border Farce using razor wire to slice dinghies mid-Channel, are just 2 of his offerings.
   Nice to see a would-be politician with a sense of perspective!

Diet firms that offer blood-sugar monitoring gadgets are getting the blame for creating large numbers of healthy people with anxiety & eating disorders because they don't understand what the numbers are telling them.

Another Smarmer lie Xposed by N. Lamont, Chancellor in the early 1990s; Labour is about redistribution of wealth to itself & its mates, not about creating it.
   Worse, Bier Smarmer wants to nationalize everything, even though someone has to have mentioned that the public sector eats the nation's wealth and it's the private sector that creates it.
   But maybe he just wasn't listening.
“When Labour clowns tell you're they're going to 'invest' in something, that's in the same sense of going darn the pub to 'invest' in a pint of bier.” Arne T. Dote

Sherie opens more bottles of Bier
“Will feeling contempt for the idiots who voted in Smarmer's deadlegs keep us warn in winter? Which will still descend on us, despite all the Milipedery & BS from the gorbal warmists.” Al Iskooper
“Decoding Smarmer is easy if you start by assuming he's lying to you. Your next step is to work out what he hopes to blag.” U. Sless-Burgher
“He's a serial & unashamed liar. Is that the message?” Strigh Kwon
“Sometimes he knows he's lying, as when he does his Chaos Theory act. Or he's just repeating something one of his stooges said without knowing what it means.” U. Sless-Burgher
“Change for the Worse is the Smarmer Curse.” Clawd Yereyesoot

Vote Farage, Get Smarmer, vote Trivial, get Smarmer, Punish The Tories, blight your own future—how hard is that to grasp?

Today’s Question:
Is there any advantage to us in having a PM who is even more dishonest than Vlad the Putin?
“Bier Smarmer behaves like someone no concept of fact and fiction. He'll lie his fukin' head off totally shamelessly about anything he thinks could be to his advantage and then go into his indignation routine when someone hauls him up for doing it.” Stravin Sky

Bafflement as a sales gimmick
The price of toothpaste, razors, mouthwash & similar products can vary dramatically through the year and the same products can have hugely different prices in different stores.
   But the fact remains that anyone who pays Waitrose £25.20 for a 75 ml tube of toothpaste has to be insane or on the public payroll.

The Labour Brexit sell-out will begin with the recruitment of former snivel servant Sir Oily, TheRazor May's Brexit bunger-in-chief, who let the EFU walk all over him. He will join the Smarmer back-office gang led by Boris back-stabber Sugar Ray.
Bier Smarmer will put himself on a 4-day week if made prime monster, he has announced. And he will spend at least half of those 4 days shirking @ home.
Putin the Poisoner's election interferers are working hard for a Labour win so that Putrid will be able to form the next government.

Bad news from the Xperts for the people who think that taking multivitamins will help them to live forever. Nope, it won't.

Reform's election candidates know they're no-hopers and they're grabbing with both hands, the opportunity to be cheeky about everyone & everything, and giving the news meeja lotz to be aghast about.
The Trivials are taking much the same attitude, with Horizon Hero Eddie Gravy's stunt double getting up to all sorts of daftness.

The arrogant buggers of the BMA trade union are in trouble for being condescending to women and downright sexist. And for wearing union-logo beanie hats made in China by slave-conditions labour.

"Ly-ing bastard!" clap-clap, clap, clap-clap.**
[**There could have been something about Bier Smarmer here but we couldn't be bothered with it. Ed.]

Lawyers will tell you anything: "M'lud, my client weights 30 stones and he's too fat to kidnap anyone."

Quote of the Day:
"It's time to change the type of chaos."
—Bier Smarmer

NHS Fife in Scotland is having to fight a rearguard action over its decision to give men claiming to be female priority over real women. Which means more taxpayers' dosh is about to be paid in compenbloodysation for official stoopidity.
The animal cruelty lobby is starting to home in on the weirdo celebs who insist on lugging dogs around in handbags & prams, and putting the pet @ risk of death by suffocation.
The anti-white lobby in the TV industry is getting very sensitive in its old age. The mere mention of the decline in the number of white, male TV anchors is enuff to set off a mudslide of protest.
Bier Smarmer's solution to the migration ishue is to send back the 42 illegals who came here from Bangladesh & then declare: "Job done!"
The Bangladeshi community in the UK has taken this as a licence to play the victim card & claim that Bier wants to deport all 650,000 of them. Which would have the advantage of creating a bit of room for the flood of boat people taking advantage of BS's ban on border secruity.

Welcome to Black Friday
and the end of civilization in the UK.

A zero with the rim rubbed off

The price of not paying attention
Something to put the Arts industry in a state of fear & trembling—Bier Smarmer's stooges think the taxpayer should stop bunging luvvies (in order to bung more of Labour's paymasters) and the Arts will have to manage on what they can blag from philanthropists, who are likely to be severely unimpressed by the Bier Grab.
   Shame the Arts luvvies who went big for Labour weren't told this before they fired off a multi-luvvie letter to The Times.

BS: Whatever he has to say, you’ll pay
Labour is making no attempt to deny that BS will find a way to let his minions take the blame for grabbing the Winter Fuel Allowance from pensioners. No one surprised.

Early start to the Silly Season?
A late entry for the daftest story of June comes from Gumi in South Korea, where a robot that delivered mail in the city council offices was described as having committed suicide after it fell down some stairs and was found in a smashed up condition at the bottom of them.

A shark spotted swimming near Bournemouth pier was more in danger than the paddlers @ the shore, the Xperts reckon. Tope sharks have no history of unprovoked attacks on humans, who have put them on the endangered list.

Unsmart motorways have become even more dangerous. The Stopped Vehicle Radar system has stopped working due to an intermittent fault.

Some discreet census taking among Jr.Dox has revealed that only 2% of them weren't telling a Smarmer lie when they did the Hippocratic Oath.

Sherie bobs back
“If we don't like Bier's change, can we change to something that might just be some good to us? Joke.” Alexei Jetski
“Labour will promise you anything, spend all your money then dump the blame on you. It's what they always do.” Par Kitin

Never saw that one coming?
The politicians in the Untied States have created the greatest SNAFU of all time. There is no mechanism they can use to force an incompetent president to step down & Creaky Joe Biden is too puddled to get that he can't handle the job now, never mind for another 4 years.
   America's only hope is that Mrs. B. can get through to Joe if she can catch him in a lucid moment. America's big problem is not knowing whether she will do it if she gets the opportunity, or if she will just let Joe keep on making a fool of himself whilst she continues to pursue her newfound interest in being on magazine covers?

Over the top is the only direction they know
No surprise that the Home Office's Prevent programm is overloaded with stooges who are obsessed with proving that pre-teen kids are in danger of being radicalized by their largely imaginary far-Right, and who don't know the difference between toys approved by the likes of English Heritage & actual lethal weapons.

A weighty ishue
People who offer donkey rides on beaches have upset the fatist bullies by weighing kids & setting a limit of 6 stones. The fatists see nothing wrong with animal cruelty as long as their delicate sensibilities remain undisturbed.

The T’ronno Argonauts in Regina, Susquatchland
Punt by the Argos, then a punt by the RoughRiders was returned 83 yards for a TD! No PAT, 6-0. The Riders forced a fumble in the 10th minute, FG from it, 6-3. One for the Argos to start Q2, 9-3.
   Toughdown Riders in the 10th minute, through Swiss cheese, 9-10. The Argos missed a FG in the 13th minute. A pick with a minute left gave the ball to the Riders but a FG try from the TA 49 missed.
   In Q3, the Riders kicked a FG for 9-13. One back for the Argos, 12-13. A pick went to a diving TD for the RR, 12-20. One back in Q4 from the RR 3 for the Argos, +2, 20-all. Another pick by the RR defence in the 9th minute was returned for a TD! 20-27.
   Another pick right away went to a FG, 20-30. One for the Argos with 2 minutes left, 23-30 and that's as close as they got.

Weather control continues to screw up on the European mainland, awarding violent storms to Switzerland and the neighbouring parts of France & Italy whilst letting northern Greece struggle with wildfires and pray in vain for rain.

Something else to thank the legal trade for—killers who end up in a secure hospital (a.k.a. looney bin) can fill their bank accounts with state benefits even though the taxpayer pays for everything and they're not able to seek employment. Which would not be possible if they were sane enuff to be in gaol.

Next, the Ottawa RedBlacks in Winnipeg
The Blue Bombers were sacked to a FG to open the scoring. One for the RBs after 12 minutes, 3-all. A long FG in Q2 put the BB 3-6 ahead. A big run by Olivera set up a major from the RB 1, 3-13. A botched pass stopped the RBs in the last minute of the half.
   A QB mugging by Jefferson gave the ball to the BB early in Q3, the drive stalled, FG, 3-16. TD for the RBs in the 13th minute, 10-16. Another BB FG to close the quarter, 10-19. A pick in the first minute of Q4 gave the ball to the Bombers, FG, 10-22.
   One for the RBs with 3 minutes & change left, 13-22. Boot by the RBs, 16-22. Boot by the BB with 5 seconds left, 16-25 final.

£6.50 for a pint of non-alcoholic bier in a re-usable eco-cup @ bloody Wimbledon? Deferably in the ‘they saw you coming' category.

Fabulous concotion
The latest ‘believe it or what' is that the asteroid impact on South America 65 million years ago; the one that got the credit (falsely) for wiping out the dinosaurs; should also get the credit for creating grapes & wine.
   The story goes that dinos knocked down the trees that vines climb, and in their absence, trees & vines were able to flourish. Right.

A good law firm to avoid is one with a hot-line for snoflakes so that they can do whinges about micro-aggressions & all sorts of other woke imaginings.

America can relax again. Creaky Joe's meltdown in his latest ‘debate' with D. Trump was due to jet-lag. That's his alibi, anyway. He went abroad a bit and it felt like he'd travelled round the world a couple of times to a bloke who's 181 years old. Shame Jill Biden likes being First Lady too much to tell him to give up voluntarity.

And so it begins . . .
   . . . another Labour kleptocracy
But Kaptain Khaos doesn't do weekends, he stops work at 6 p.m. regardless and he does only 2 days per week in the office.
   But then, the less a politician does, the safer we are. True!

Kaptain Khaos Bier Smarmer has created another world record. With his approval rating down in the depths of a Brown Hole, Mr. 20% is the most unpopular leader our country has ever had bar none.
This week, Bier Smarmer is mostly thinking that blokes pretending to be women do not have a right to invade female spaces.
   Next week, who knows?

Another Labour general election record:
20.28% of the electorate voted Labour
79.72% didn't vote Labour
40.01% couldn't be arsed to vote at all

Sherie opens even more bottles of Bier
“Who gets the job of Labour's Minister for Total Stoopidity? The competition must be really fierce.” O.F. Rack
“99.9% of the population think BS is UseLEZ. 20% of the electorate proved they're the same by voting Labour.” Thin Vader
“Do you want a dull pudding who's a serial liar as your prime monster? Tough if you don't.” R.U. Snoring
“When he sez 'change' it's as in 'change his mind', which happens about every 18 seconds.” Justin Thyme
“Re: your feature cartoon a couple of days ago—were the punters @ the DreamBookie also putting bets on if it would be the Boris Bullet or the Corbynstein Crunch for the Biery Smarmer?” Corporal Handgrenade

The Calgary Stampeders in Montreal
Defences were in charge initially. The Alouettes stopped the Stamps in the 5th minute with a pick and went on to a TD. The Stamps battled to the MTL 1 and went in for a TD on 3rd down, 7-all in the 14th minute.
   The Als fumbled the ball away to start Q2, FG from it, 10-7. A quick pick gave the ball back to the Stamps. Another 3rd & goal from the MTL 1, 17-7? Nope, the PAT was blocked & returned for 2 by the Als, 16-9. Another TD for the Stamps in the 14th minute, 23-9. The Als finished the half with a FG and 23-12.
   A FG for the Stamps in the 9th minute of Q3, 26-12. The Stamps kept a MA drive going with penalties, FG, 26-15. In Q4, the Als managed just a TD when +2 would have put them a FG behind, 26-21. A FG with 5 minutes left, 26-24. The Als got to scoring range, TD with a minute left, 26-30. A pick by the Als sealed the win.

Bad news for the Untied States. The Biden inner circle in the Democrap organization is planning to sideline all the bedwetters in the party because they think that binning Creaky Joe just 4 months ahead of the November presidential election would cause chaos.
   That's the real thing, not the imaginings of BS, a.k.a. Kaptain Khaos.

Q: How do you get away with murder?
A: Convince some medical Xperts that you're schizophrenic.
Q: Sure thing, then?
A: Unless you're daft enuff to give yourself away 5 years down the line & a proper investigation goes to a murder charge.

Delusion Rulz everywhere
Being a stolid, Slavic Serb doesn't mean you have to be sensible, which is why they can get away with pretending that the ancient pyramids @ Visco in Bosnia emit cosmic energy.
[Which didn't do the locals much good when Slobberedon Milosevich and his gang were trying to commit genocide of Bosnian Moslems. Ed]
   They also go in for eating grass, pretending to cleanse food using telekinesis & pretending spring water from under the pyramids has healing powers.

Public Service Announcement He's been called the Blogger of the Decade His intellect is matched only by the size of his luck and the size of his bank balance. And yet he manages to keep his Feet On The Ground with the greatest of ease. Do yourself a favour and find out what Xavier has had to say about what's going on Right Now!

WEEK 2    CHANGE for the worse is NOT any sort of improvement

 
Week 5 ended with the BC Lions in winless Hamilton
The Lions started with a quick TD. They were back for another after 6 minutes, 14-0. Hamilton got on the scoreboard with a rouge from a punt in the last minute of Q1, 14-1.
   Another TD for the Lions in the second minute of Q2, 21-1. Then a FG, 24-1. Finally, a TD for the TigerCats in the 6th minute, 24-8. Bang! One for the Lions after one play! 31-8. The Cats kicked a FG after 11 minutes, and one for BC in the last minute of the half, 34-11.
   The Cats kicked a FG 5 minutes in to Q3, 34-14. One for BC, 37-14. The Cats got close, TD after 14 minutes, 37-21. The Lions scored another TD in the closing stages of Q4, 44-21, leaving time for a TC TD pass @ 0.00, 44-28 final.

Dirty rotten spoilsports!
The US Supreme Court has thrown a major spoke in the Democrap plan to toss D. Trump in gaol before November by being vague about what a president can and can't be charged with.
   The legal trade is already counting the fees from appeals & retrials, which will go on until well into 2025.
   The Democraps, natch, are outraged by this interference in their blatant stitch-up plans.

Doing your enemy a favour
President Eleven is applauding Edstone Milipede's lunatic ecoscams, which will create tens of thousands of jobs in China.
   The solar panels needed for some of the scams will have to be made in China as there is no possibility of creating an industry here with a Labour government letting the trade unions be in charge.
   Capitalists will realize that investing the start-up funds outside the UK will make better sense and offer better returns.

An Alliance of Dishonour
The National Rally Party in France has succeeded in rallying its enemies of the far-Left into clubbing together to try to keep Marine Le Pen & Co. out of power after the election run-off.
President MacRon is getting a lot of flak from conspiracy theorists, who are claiming he did the NR gang a big favour by calling the snap election. Mainly because the why of it is defeating them totally.

Despite what Horizon Hero E. Gravy is telling us, the Trivials remain an irrelevance @ Westmonster like Reform, the Greens, the SNP, etc.

“The meeja were getting in an uproar over a Reform election candidate repeating the BS in a libel lounge that the banks are all owned by Jews. Strange that no one could be bothered to find out where Awful Angie does her banking & twit her about it.” K.Roshvel

Different chaos is not progress
Despite the lies BS & former banker Reevsie have unloaded on us, the economy is in good shape now, not crashed. Which leaves the Xperts wondering if Labour will deliberately go on a tax-raising splurge to prevent the creation of prosperity and create their crashed state retrospectively.
   Smarmer's Army are certainly the sort of people who would try something like this.

Can it get worser? Oh, yes. Much.
The Mid & South Essex NHS Foundation Trust has created a new A&E world record for a patient, who had to hang about there for 9 days, 14 hours and 25 minutes before being awarded a hospital bed.
Attempts by the Labour stooge Wee Streeting to claim that his party would fix the problem were torpedoed by the observation that if Labour had a fix, they would have applied it in Wales, where they are in charge of the NHS. But waiting times there are 8 weeks longer than the corresponding ones in England.

Remember that Biden debate fiasco? Yeah, let’s go with . . . Jim!

No wonder the country is down in the dumps. There are sad bastards around who will pay £8/month for online pix of a pop person's feet.

Polluter to pay, shockhorror
The Supreme Court here has ruled that water companies which fail to upgrade sewage infrastructure can be sued for discharges into public waterways which contaminate riverside properties.

We don't seem to be getting any of the summer stories of caravan cowboys parking somewhere nice, polluting the enviromint with junk & pushing off. Is this the diversity mob up to their sinister censorship tricks?

Q: What is more useless than a kettle with no water in it? Apart from Beer Smarmer, of course.
A: Deprived of the obvious choice, pass.

Wealth– & brain–drains ongoing
An estimated 17.4% of Britain's wealthiest citizens & non-doms are well into the process of selling up and leaving before Labour goes crazy with theft taxes. More will follow them.

A very Labour choice—100,000 transpicaters count for more than the 30 million women in England & Wales.

How pleased is Vlad the Putin with the Labour election win that his vote-riggers managed with just 20% of the electorate? Well, he hasn't invaded anywhere this month.
“And the Islamists are also looking cheerful now their Corbynatic pal Bier is PM.” Phal O'Mar
“If Angrier Raygun succeeds in cancelling wealth-creating capitalism, where does she think the money to buy her pints of bile á la mode will come from?” Clow D. Sky

Initial sales reports show that voodoo dolls, plus a set of pins, of Angrier Raygun are moving 12 times faster than those of Bier Smarmer.

The Glastonbury music festival is getting a booting for failing to hold a minute's silence for the 1,200 Israelis murdered by the Hamas on October 7th and half an hour for the 37,000 Palestinians killed by the Israeli Death Force since then.

Gooble is wrecking the planet with its carbon emissions, the climate criminals are yelling. Its power requirements for keeping its A.I. systems blundering are responsible for a MASSIVE . . . 0.07% of human carbon emissions. Not Xactly China or India, is it?
   Especially when yu remember that 96.13% of total carbon emissions come from the natural world. Which means the whingers are going on about 0.07% of the 3.87% contributed by humans.

Today’s Definition: trope—a wonky cliché

Q: Why are they called the Left?
A: Because they behave as if they also left their brain behind when they hung up their coat.
Q: How is Mr. 20% going to build 300,000 new houses per year over the next 5 years?
A: President Kim of North Korea has offered a workforce if Putin the Poisoner doesn't need all his spare bodies as cannon fodder in Ukraine.

45,998 votes of 62,422 available were cast in the Hazel Grove constituency, 17,328 went to the Trivials = 27.8% of the electorate and their vote was 0.5% down on 2019. Not a lot of enthusiasm—just a case of the majority vote being split—if 72.2% of the electorate rejected them.

Labour will now move on from levelling up to spending up then vanishing.
It's what they do.

Sherie reveals more all
“Nutty Nigel was claiming the first thing he'll do after getting himself elected as an MP is to abolish the BierBC licence fee. How? He's not in charge of nuffink.” Roscoe Pilge
“Any Xplanations from the pollsters who were confidently predicting that the Conservative party would end up with just 50-some seats?” U. Rope
“The Xperts reckon thast only 10% of the human brain is doing anything useful @ any given moment. Or, in the case of Mr. 20% Smarmer, 2%. Which Xplains rather a lot.” Sol O'Monella
“Does that mean he Xpects to cop for only 20% of the blame when the wheels come off, as they always do with Labour in charge? Or will he be long gone when the Big Smash comes?” Soda Lite
“Would it be possible to get Bier Smarmer permanently wired up to a polygraph lie detector to find out if he ever tells the truth?” Mech O'Nism

Fair’s Fair
If animal rights nutters are going to revive rustling attacks on RSPCA rescue farms, can the staff revive the Western countermeasure of stringing them up from the nearest substantial tree?

BS delivers more BS
Having the most working class cabinet of all time is no sort of recommendation, especially if the stooges are lying about it, as Bier does.
   What the customers want is competence. But if Labour is involved, that's out of the question. Hence the need for Smarmer to get his stooges to join in his own lie about being working class.

What do the UK & the US have in common? A wish that they could have been offered a difference choice for their most important elections.

Wot a tragedy! 81.2% of Millennials reckon they can't afford to have a mid-life crisis and they're just going to have to struggle on like the millions & millions of their ancestors did before the concept was concocted.

According to the latest sadistics, a tourist is likely to spend 18.7 times longer in a ‘get there' queue than the time spent gawping at the world's most popular tourist attractions.

Today’s Question:
Are there any advantages for a government which arrives with Nett Zero Xpectations of competence & an assumption that everything it tells the customers will be only a convenient part of the truth or an outright lie?

82% of Shirk @ Homers, an anonymous respondent survey found, admitted watching TV during what are supposed to be working hours, indicating that the true figure is a lot closer to 100%.

What we’ll never get from Nicro Binbag of the BierBC:
"So, Mr. Smarmer, how does it feel knowing 80% of those with a vote didn't give it to your party?"

Q: Who has a better chance of surviving a full term in office as president or prime monster, Creaky Joe or Lyin' Smarmer?
A: Neither.
Q: Will it make any difference if a moderate won Iran's presidential election and a hard-liner didn't?
A: As the current Ayatollah Bunchacommies is always in charge of everything, the presidency remains 100% cosmetic.
Q: 'Liberals celebrate best election results for a century'—are they somebody now?
A: Nope, they're still just making up the numbers, and if their vote was lower in this election in the constituency that includes Romiley, that shows there is no great enthusiasm for them.

Sheer sabotage
How do you stop the public giving cash to the historic Roman baths in Bath? Stop letting them toss coins into the wishing well and demand contactless donations via a bank card was hugely successful.
   Donations went down £90K over a year to just £14K. The reason given for the change was that coins were damaging the reception vessel. Lining it with something strong but transparent would have been a better move.

Despite the internet & pocket phones, 95% of Japanese offices still use a fax machine. But the government is coming for them.
Being a psychopath goes with investing in cryptocurrencies, the Xperts have found.
Bier Smarmer had to do a tour of the 4 UK nations on becoming prime monster as he has never been out of the London area before and he has no idea what goes on elsewhere.

Uphill struggle to epic fail!
Our new Chancellor was promising to grow Britain's economy. Big problem. She has admitted that Gordon F. Broon is her financial guru. That's the lunatic who dug a £1,000 BILLION Brown Hole of debt for us with his tax & waste policies and let all the banks go bust in 2008. Which means that there is not a lot of confidence available for Ms Reeves.

If it’s Green, the numbers don’t Mean (anything)
Xperts in London reckon that blowing tens of millions of pounds on painting roofs in the city white will reflect sunlight & reduce the city's temperature during a baking hot summer.
   Which leaves us wondering if anyone will notice any difference if the temperature in that summer is reduced from 32 deg.C to . . . 30.8 deg.C.
   That's right. That's all their computer simulation offers. A lousy 1.2 deg.C less.

Politics & good sense gang thegither? Nope!
It looks like the BSP** is facing severe competition from France, where raving hard-Left nutters are hoping to make Reevesie look like a rank amateur where spending a nation into a Brown Chasm of Debt is concerned.
   And lowering the already ridiculously low retirement age will make Angrier Robot look almost competent.
[**Bier Smarmer Paradise, Ed.]

Not a brilliant alibi
A reason why the SnackStabber was so sneaky & speedy about calling the election, rushing to King Chuck to outflank his Cabinet & prevent them from stopping him, has been revealed.
   He hoped the rush job would fucq things up for the Farage bloke. Instead, Nige fucq'd things up for the Tories. And the entire nation, too, let us not forget. You bastard, Nige.

Ishues to address
Was there a note of relief in Bier Smarmer's observation that we have had an Asian-roots prime monster in the person of the SnackStabber? Box ticked, no need to do it again in a hurry, the number of challengers for his pro-tem job reduced a bit.
Does having the endorsement of just 20% of the electorate serve as an alibi for BS getting value for our money from just 20% of what his stooges do?
   And 0% value from everything Edstone Milipede does, of course.

Q: What's a rail company boss's best hope of copping for a stonking bonus?
A: Meet spurious targets for diversity, environmental stuff & all the usual BS, and you can preside over 60,000 train cancellations & a totally crap service, and still get a bee's knees rating.

“Lying bastards!” clap-clap, clap, clap-clap
What they tell you: "Things can only get better."
Grim reality: But never with Labour in government.

Early in the second half of 2020, when the Chinese plague was sloshing around vigorously and the alleged Xperts were contradicting one another furiously, NASA was talking about putting people on the Moon again in 2024.
   Any sign of that happening?

If you're Beer Smarmer, you can quite casually waste the £300 MILLION of our money already spent on the Rwanda Xport scheme without having anything to replace it. He's that useless & clueless.
Next thing you know, Smarmer's Army, which wants to give criminals a 60% discount on their gaol sentence, will be working hard to import undesirables like the Bride of Daesh, S. Begum.
Smoking rates are falling year on year in the UK but the number of smoking related cancers is @ a record level. No Xplanation on offer for this but it sounds like the alleged Xperts are missing something.
An independent inquirty into the administration of the Nursing & Midwifery Council has found a toxic culture, which prevents staff from doing their jobs properly and lets criminals get away with it.
   Will the guilty bosses get the sack? Don't hold your breath.

Off to Montreal for the Argonauts in Week 6
The Alouettes opened the scoring; with a rouge from a FG try. More crunching defence. A FG try by the Argos went through in the last minute of Q1, 3-1. Another rouge for the Als, then they were picked for a TD after 7 minutes of Q2 when pinned deep in their half. 10-2.
   A bomb pass to the end zone after 11 minutes got the Als to 10-9. A solid drive by the Argos went to a TD with 2 minutes left, 17-9. The Als battled to the TA 1, TD, no +2, 17-15. So the Argos returned the kick off for a TD!! 24-15.
   The Argos fumbled the ball away 6 minutes in to Q3. Nowt from it. A FG in the 10th minute put the Argos 27-15 up. A long FG for the Als, 27-18. Another TD for the Argos in the 7th minute of Q4, 34-18. Then another pick by them. Add a FG in the last minute, 37-18 final.

Reconciling the impossible? Just not on.
The Labour plan for ending prison chaos is to evict all the inmates but keep the screws in place in the empty buildings & still on the public payroll so that the Labour party still gets bungs from the taxpayer via their trade union.
   According to our current Justice Sec., cities could be wrecked by looters if Labour doesn't empty the prisons. To do what? Put violent criminals back on the streets to give the looters a hand if they go at it anyway?
“If this is yet another Xample of Bier's diversity in government scam (with an 80% quota for incompetents?), we are definitely in deep trouble. But we've known that for over a week now.” Perven Vitral

Next, the Stampeders in Winnipeg
A quick drive by the Stamps got them a TD in the 3rd minute. A pick by the Stamps went to a pick the other way! FG from it, 7-3. The Blue Bomber defence forced & recovered a fumble as Q1 ran out, 57-yard FG, 7-6. One for the CS in the 5th minute of Q2, 10-6. One for the BB, 10-9. And for the CS, 13-9. DPI by the CS defending a bomb to the end zone by Collards? Nope, a TD for the Bombers! 13-16.
   A pick by the BB with 2 minutes left in the half went to another TD! 13-23. A bomb pass from Maier, TD, 20-23. Which left time for a FG from the Stamps and 23-all at the half.
   A long FG try by the BB to start Q3 missed. Collards was picked in the CS end zone. Blocking a CS punt gave the BB a short field, on to a TD, 23-30. The Stamps got level with a TD early in Q4. A FG in the 6th minute put the BB 30-33 up.
   The CS drove to the BB 5, TD, 37-33. Some fine passing by Collards and great receiving, TD in the 12th minute, +2, 37-41. And that was enuff for the win.

“Useless bastard!” clap-clap, clap, clap-clap
London's unloved cosmetic mayor, Sadgeek K'han't, is even more unpopular after refusing to provide a fan zone for England's Euros semi-final against the Netherlands. Which went to a last-minute goal by England for a 2-1 win.

Strange brew
The female(?) Labour MP who thinks whether someone is a woman depends on the context, is to be made the BS minister for women.
   This is seen as part of the BS back-office strategy of putting the least likely filler into a gap to distract attention from the deficiencies of the Blessed Leader.
   Sounds like any port in a storm rules are being applied right away!

We thought of doing a list of Labour's Week One Screw-Ups but we lost the will to live @ No. 47.
Bloody Wimbledon has been something of a washout this year. A month's rain on SW 19 in the first week didn't help, and modern spectators lacking the tenacity of their ancestors have caused attendance figures to droop to a 25-year low.
The Xperts reckon that 6 million shirkers will do so from the beach during the summer; if we get one; which will severely upset the mugs stuck in the office, actually doing most of the work.
Will this summer be recorded as the one with the highest rainfall or the lowest incidence of wildfires for a while? No question of the choice if the climate criminals get their way.

Very near miss
Donald Trump survived a murder attempt at a political rally in Pennsylvania. The shooter, perched on a rooftop and armed with a rifle, clipped his right ear with a bullet.
   One of the crowd at the at the rally was killed and two more ended up in hospital, seriously injured, before the gunman was shot dead by security forces.
   The Secret Service is now having to evade a lot of awkward questions, such as by claiming the shooter was in an area that was the responsibility of the local police.

Third place = a safe refuge?
Some of the political pundits are giving the win in France to Marine Le Pen & her Notional Rally party. They were elbowed out of contention for forming a government by an unholy alliance of the hard-Left, and the NR gang can now sit in dignity on the sidelines whilst the 'victors' battle like rats in a sack & cause a huge shambles.

Today’s Question: Which diminutive politician almost said this?
"When we talk about the Will of the People, let us remember the 80% who didn't vote Labour. Let us think about what they deserve."

The Israeli Death Force is still racking up its score in Gaza. Another 71 Palestinians killed by an air attack on a designated humanitarian area and 289 injured.
What, one wonders, makes a body parts dumper think it's a good idea to lug them from London all the way to Bristol to park them on the Clifton Suspension Bridge?

The RoughRiders in Vancouver, BC
The Lions raced down the field but they were held to an opening FG. A pick stopped the Riders. The Lions went 10-0 up with a TD. A pass play took the Riders to the BC 3, TD in the 13th minute, 7-10.
   A sack at the end of Q1 halted BC, FG to start Q2, 7-13. Another after 6 minutes, 7-16. A big pass play got the RR to the BC 5, just a FG, though, 10-16. One for the Lions with a couple of minutes to go, 10-19.
   A FG try by the Riders in the 4th minute of Q3 missed. A promising BC drive was stopped by a pick. On to a FG, 13-19. One for BC in the 14th minute, 13-22. The Riders surged into Q4, Charge! from the BC 1, out on 3rd down. Adams was picked throwing from his end zone, 1st & goal again for the Riders, TD this time, 20-22.
   The RR recovered their own kick off! A BC mugging gave them a fumble recovery. Adams made a dash for the end zone after 7 minutes, 20-29. Whyte again with a FG in the 14th minute, 20-32. And again as the last play of the match, 20-35 final. Phew!

Creaky Joe thinks the president of embattled Ukraine is called Putin and his own unloved vice-president is called Trump. No one surprised.
“Does that mean Bier Smarmer is such a lousy judge of people that he doesn't know someone is past it when he meets him face-to-face? Or was Bier just doing the usual lying to us when he claimed Joe is on the ball and doing a grand job?” Ed Serious
[Maybe he is, compared to Bier. Or Bier was lying. Ed.]

Reevesie, our economy growing Chancellor, is already pushing the tax rise button. No one surprised. It's wot Labour always does.
Bier Smarmer seems to think that foreign governments will be impressed by his claim to have the largest cohort from the Algae Boutique in the whole world in Smarmer's Parliamentary Army. How desperate can you get?
[clue: Bier can do desperater. Ed.]
The next queue @ the bookies will be to put bets on how many unions go on strike because there isn't enuff of our dosh available to pay off all of Labour's pals.

Boo to Bier
On opening day in the Commons, Abbaccuss Abbott, now the most ancient fossil in the Commons, got a good Smarming from her enemy, Bier, who tried to shove her into retirement. She chose to ignore him completely when she got a turn to say nothing much.

A good way for a young woman with a large chest to get a chunk of undeserved compenbloodysation is to dress like a tart & then complain when blokes notice.

WEEK 3    Change gives just an illusion of progress

 
There was a state of aghastness in Santa Fe, New Mexico, at the end of last week. The case of involuntary manslaughter against the actor A. Baldwin collapsed when the prosecution was found guilty of intentionally & deliberately withholding information from the defence.
   The judge had no choice but to toss the case in the bin right away "with prejudice". Which means the prosecutors will not get another go at bringing it ever again.
   The only good thing to come out of it is that the case can be taught in legal schools as an awful example of how not to do it.

The Ottawa RedBlacks were out west in Edmonton
The RBs opened the scoring with a FG. The Antlers recovered a fumble in the 11th minute and went on to a TD pass to Smith, 3-7. Roughing the kicker turned a punt into a drive continuation to a highlight reel end zone pass, 3-14. Add a single from the kick off.
   The RBs were sacked to a FG, 6-15. The RBs recovered a fumble in the 14th minute, end zone DPI, TD, 13-15.
   The Antlers kicked a FG in the 10th minute of Q3, 13-18. A huge TD pass, +2, gave the RBs a 21-18 lead. A pick set up a missed FG try for a rouge in Q4, 21-19. Another long bomb pass, TD Ottawa, 28-19. A FG extended the lead to 31-19. A TD from the RB 3 and +2 got the Anglers to 31-27 in the 10th minute.
   The RBs were held to a FG, 34-27. 3rd & 11, DPI in the end zone, TD for the Antlers with 8 seconds on the clock. Just a 38 yard FG from Ward gave the RBs a 37-34 walk off victory. Groan.

Economy avoids £43 billion hit
That's the estimated price of the bank holiday which Bier Smarmer wanted to declare as a self-publicity stunt had England's football team won the Euros. Spain 2, England 1 at the final whistle.

Another one just making up the numbers
Despite all the shrilling BS about creating a gang-smashing quango that's coming from Home Sec. Mrs. Balls-Cooper, the Syrian refugee's alleged best mate, small boats are still being hoovered out of the Channel by the Border Farce.
   Worse, BS is already getting his alibis in place over the small boat invasion. He's not able to offer any hope in a reduction in their numbers by the time the next general election comes due.

We're not supposed to notice that a neurologist who specializes in Parkinson's disease keeps visiting the White House for meetings with Creaky Joe's medical minders.
The feminist lobby is being severely pissed off by attempts to portray the American president's wife as Lady McBiden, who is refusing to let Creaky Joe retire because she wants to continue to bask in the limelight.
Crumbs! There are vending machines that will sell any amount of ammo to customers in supermarkets in Alabama, Oklahoma & Texas, the gun-crime capital of the Untied States.
The super-rich are getting out of France following the hard-Left election stitch-up & the threat of being clobbered with a 90% wealth tax. Which will be rather catastrophic for the French O.J. Corbynstein, J.-L. Melenchon, who wants to splurge cash @ his supporters and reduce the pension age from 64 to 60.

The Office for Notional Budget Sadistics keeps revising its guess for the state of the economy upwards. Predictably, Chancellor Reevesie keeps trotting out the BS Labour lie that the Tories trashed it. No mention of the Brown Bust & the Chinese plague in her State of the Nation BS for bankers of course. No one surprised.
The UK economy was growing at its fastest pace for 2 years before the general election, the official accountants have concluded, and recovering nicely from the drag of the Chinese plague. Which Xposes the BS claims of a crash/stagnation as yet more lies.

Fair’s Fair
Remoaner Bier Smarmer was yelling that losing the Brexit referendum by getting 48% of the vote entitled his gang to a second referendum.
   What's his response to calls for a rerun of the general election if 80% of the electorate rejected him?
   Silence.

Sherie offers some Biery comments
“Wouldn't it be a riot if BS moved his gang into the prime monster's flat @ 11, Downing Street, rented out his suburban mansion to make a few bob and found it full of soil after being turned into a cannabis ranch?” Omega O'Mikron
“Is it true that Bier Smarmer's family name used to be O'Tool but he changed it to something less Irish when he took up the law trade?” Palin Cleese

Don’t you just wish they could be honest just the once?
The Labour Nett Zero plan is to move our emissions to other countries which don't give a rat's arse about them and claim that Smarmer's Army is single-handedly saving the world from gorbal warmage. Even if the amount of global fossil fuel usage increases as a result of his Milipedery.

++ Labour failure to ‘stop the boats' claims 4 more lives ++ Crocodile tears from Home Sec. ++
   Is that unfair? Not if it's what Labour would be saying about the Tories if they weren't in office.
   Anything goes in pollyticks now.

Doshan Blida
The Foreign Sec., D. ‘Playboy' Lammy, was trying to hoover up UK Moslem customers with an ignorable demand for a cease-fire on a jolly to Israel. No one who counts was listening or impressed.

Rear view mirror
The BS claim that he will govern with integrity hit the buffers after a couple of days when he gave an £80K job to the former Labour MP who swindled the taxpayer out of 100 grand by pretending her sister's spare room was her main residence. BS is having to make her a life peer to add a veneer of legitimacy to a tainted manoeuvre.

When BS claims he will make a difference, what he is really saying is that he will create indifference as there will be no solution on offer for the problem.

Q: How exhausting is it to have to come up for Xplanations for doing things which you tried to obstruct in Opposition, e.g. booting the NHS Blob into wasting less cash?
A: Not terrifically if you know everyone else will know that your Xcuse is just routine political BS.

If Smarmer's Army claim they had no idea of the Xact state of the prison & probation services, they are lying. They have been briefed by snivel servants since January (officially as well as the usual channels) and they knew Xactly what the state of things was when they took office. Which makes all the talk of the need to empty the prisons to prevent riots everywhere just routine BS.

That’s the best he can do?
You start to realize what a bunch of deadlegs the Labour lot are when Beer Starmer is reduced to bragging that his gang contains more sexual deviants than any other governing party on the planet.

The announcement that Dyson is getting rid of 30% of the UK workforce came as a real surprise to all those who assumed Sir James had already shifted his operation entirely to the Far East, where it's cheaper to do good business.

Labour has been forced to do a U-turn on its support for the sick-note culture now that Wee Streeting & his crew will get the blame for the failures of the NHS & the Blobish leadership in the snivel service.

Bad news for caffeine cravers. Bad weather in India has reduced the tea harvest and shoved prices up. Coffee is also going up and up.

Team Trump in the Untied States thinks the UK will become the first lunatic Islamist-controlled nation with nukes under Labour thanks to their MPs continuing to support the Pal Pals & the Hamas.

Chancellor Reevesie is being accuse of quoting her secret hero by wearing even shorter trousers than those favoured by Sue Knack, who is positively notorious for showing off his sox.

Church credibility shot if the rectors fail?
The mayor of a town in Normandy has issued an optimistic by-law commanding rain to be replaced by sunshine & light breezes from August to October.
   His next move was to order local parish rectors to communicate with heaven and make them responsible for ending the spell of wet weather.

The murder rate has shot up since Smarmer's Army took over. Killers are clearly convinced that they will get a much softer sentence from Labour. Or even away with it completely.

Bier is getting a booting for assigning so much cash to posturing greenwashing and payments to his mates that he can't do anything for defence.
   Other NATO members were not impressed when he rushed across the pond to smarm them.
   He's getting another booting for starting to sell out the UK to the EFU @ an unholy pace.

The Tory election inquest has already had one useful outcome; for them. It has Xpose Kombative Kemi Badgirl as a descendant of Attila the Hun and not someone able to achieve discipline & unity in the party's ranks.

Chancellor Reevesie is getting a booting for revealing that the real reason why Labour wants to abolish the Green Belt is to build houses for all the immigrants that they will make no attempt to prevent from arriving here uninvited to sponge off Britisch taxpayers.
[That's the taxpayers who don't have both fists buried in the public purse, of course, Ed.]
   Bier Smarmer is already trying to blame the EFU for the flood of migrants without upsetting anyone by assigning responsibility for Europeon failures in this area.

Dangerous to know
Children should not be allowed to have unsupervised interactions with chatbots, according to the Xperts @ Cambridge U. A.I. systems are not programmed with the vulnerabilities of children [and a lot of adults, Ed]
   Worse, they have an empathy gap which would result in a kid being told by a talking tin can to do something dangerous or even fatal, such as touching the prongs of a half-inserted electrical device's plug with a coin.

The reason why a play about mixed-race relationships had to announce ‘of colour' only nights to get noticed has been revealed. The play itself is garbage of the one-star ('coz there's no zero star rating) variety.

Typical Labour failure
Is it ironic that Bier Smarmer is getting advice on immigration from t.b. liar, who opened the floodgates just to annoy the Tories?
   Not if you assume the ‘advice' will be totally useless.

Over 50% of the ‘policies' listed in the latest King's Speech are things the Tories announced they would do and Labour opposed.
“Bier's years of chaos have been going on for the 16 years since he stuck his nose in the public trough. Couldn't hack it as a lawyer in the real world, that's why he ended up in pollyticks as O.J. Corbynstein's lying bastard of a best mate.” Dver Laker

Credibility Chaos
It has been pointed out that if Labour stops immigration, there will be no need to build all over the Green Belt to annoy the Tories.
   That this scam is still on the agenda tells us that whatever miracles that Labour claims are on the way to tackle immigration, legal & illegal, will be more BS lies.

April Fool rather late?
The Royal College of Physicians is now in the clutches of clowns who have fallen for the climate criminal's scam. They're also advocating remote GP appointments to cut emissions—and also cut the chance of a doctor spotting potentially serious symptoms. Even though any emissions reductions will have Nett Zero effect on the global climate.
   But, hey! Gives the clowns a chance to wave a meaningless virtue flag.
“Doctors can be dolts, just like the rest of us. Which doesn't actually fuel confidence in their competence.” Eleven Iral
“Hence the sudden ‘Lucy Letby is innocent' movement.” Thom O'Hok

Today’s Question:
Is Bier Smarmer's pants being constantly on fire due to all the lying he does the real cause of gorbal warmage?

Today’s Observation:
Politics becomes much more doable if you don't have any principles or you're prepared to discard any you do have when convenient.

The Scottish government is getting a booting for failing to regulate the fillers ‘n' botox industry, and letting criminal gangs flood the market with fake & dangerous el cheapo products from China & South Korea.

Recycled Conjecture
Creaky Joe is under mind control by aliens and their crApp has developed a severe defect, which keeps making him look like a robot with a faulty on-switch and wiring which keeps shorting out.

When clueless, do nowt
Bier O'Tool is telling us that Putinstan poses a generational threat to the UK but he has no plan on offer for defence spending, despite showering NATO with BS, even though the threat demands a ‘generational response'.
   Which means what?
   Nothing needs to be done for a generation and he wants to boot the problem 30 years into the future, when he'll be well out of pollyticks, instead of doing anything about it?
   From what we know of Bier, that sounds like what will happen.

Just let it all happen
The government is letting water companies impose stonking rises over the next 6 years to allow them to continue paying huge dividends to foreign shareholders and rack up huger debt mountains instead of spending our money on rebuilding rotting infrastructure and ending pollution of waterways with raw sewage.
   Oftwat, the alleged regulator, will remain a toothless watchdog and to hell with our enviromint, is the message.

Scumbags in Leeds hold a bonfire night in the streets for no apparent reason.
BS getting the blame for saying he's going to send fewer people to gaol.
Will there be anywhere unburnt to the ground when the next general election comes around?

How very dare they!
The Ford Motor Company is in danger of being hauled into court for egregious passing off after pretending that a chunky, 4-door electric car is actually a revival of the Capri brand, even though it looks nothing at all like the iconic, 2-door, 1970s model.

Ed Gravy, the Post Office minister who let Horizon Happen, was trying to tell the inquiry it was nothing to do with him. No one surprised.

“The Truth will set you free”, but not here
No re-counting necessary, no checking needed.
   O'Tool's Toerags have told more lies in their first week in office than any incoming regime in the last 200 years, totalitarian regimes like the ones in China, Iran, North Korea & Putinstan included.
   Apparently, Chancellor Reevesie has been claiming that our economy is in its worst shape since World War II. Is there anyone in Bier O'Tool's Cabinet who isn't a compulsive & incompetent liar?
“Is our curiously truthless Chancellor substitute hoping everyone will stop taking any notice of her—assuming she'll just come out with more prethetic lies—so that she can spend less time concocting lies and more time in the subsidized Commons bars?” E.P. Carton-Squeek

In September 2020, our ‘teenage Chancellor'** was warning that tax rises would be like acid rain upon the green shoots of prosperity. Especially if the rain fell only on the middle classes.
   But there's probably no point in mentioning this to Reevsie as she won't listen.
[**the future SnackStabber, in case no one remembers. Ed.]

Today’s Question:
How much actual difference in social acceptability is there between some character doing cultural appropriation in an Arab hoodie & a mask, and someone in a white, pointy hood?

Some recycled wisdom
Q: How quickly does Taking The Knee become Taking The Pee?
A: Faster than human science can measure.

Today’s Wisdom:
Xpectations are dangerous. Those who groom them will work any swindle they can to give theirs undeserved priority. Especially politicians.

Sherie sidles in again
“You have to wonder about the fitness for purpose of politicians who are Xposed as a shameless & incompetent liar within days of taking office rather than being found out years or even decades later.” Ak Abacious
“Where does Labour dig them up? We now have a prime monster who wants to build over anywhere that's any good because he's that sort of pretend working class nasty bastard. Sheesh!” A. Dios Gringos
“There isn't enuff money in the known universe to pay off what the trade unions think Bier & Co. owe them.” Procler Mation
“Labour's African-Icelandic Ssenneddogg, V. Getthing, has finally realized that a ‘no confidence' vote is a command to push off? The wheels do indeed grind slow.” Axel Rosin

Some conversation piece!
Anyone with £4 million to spare & 21 feet of floor space in need of filling up could try bidding for an 80% complete apatosaurus skeleton that's 150 million years old. The sale is in Paris during November, which gives would-be buyers a bit of a chance to save up.
This seems rather modest as the remains of a Stegosaurus found in Colorado went for $44.6 million @ Sothebys in Noo Yawk on the 3rd Wednesday of this month.

Q: Trump shooter downloaded pix of Princess Kate. Royal Shocker and front-page news?
A: Not even on a slow news day.

The Edmonton Antlers had a return match in 10th anniversary Ottawa
The RedBlacks opened with a TD. The visitors were held to a FG, 3-7. A kick by the RBs missed for a rouge. The Ants took a pick to a FG to close Q1 at 6-8.
   One for the RBs in Q2, 6-11. A long FG try by the Ants missed. Another pick stopped the RBs. Nowt from it. Another FG in the 14th minute, 6-14. Time left for a FG the other way, 9-14.
   Windy day, a FG miss for a rouge by the Antlers in Q3, 10-14. Another from a punt. Sack, FG, 11-17 in the last minute of Q3. Another FG miss by the Ants in Q4. One by Ward with 4 minutes left, 11-20. Boot for a FG despite the wind, 14-20. And that's how it finished.

Bier O'Tool & Labour's vexatious meddling blamed for the world's biggest IT meltdown everybloodywhere on the 3rd Friday of the month.

Was it a reincarnation of the Millennium Bug caused by a defect in MicroSoft's Windows operating system?
   MicroSoft's brilliant solution was to reboot a computer 15 times. And if that doesn't work, lose the will to live?

Next, the Blue Bombers in Regina
The BB started with a FG. One for the Riders, disguised in black, after 10 minutes, 3-all. Again for the BB in the 5th minute of Q2, 6-3. And one for the Riders, 6-all. Castillo from 61 yards in the 14th minute; short.
   The Riders got to the penalty box in Q3, wide open in the end zone, TD, 6-13. The BB lost the ball, a sack held the RR to a FG to open Q4, 6-16. The BB managed a FG 9 minutes in to Q4, 9-16. They were stopped by a forced fumble in the 13th minute. On to a FG, 9-19 with a minute & change to go. And that's how it ended.

Is it schmustice?
Is Lucy Letby, convicted baby killer, really innocent and the victim of a medical stitch up of epic proportions? If so, there isn't enuff dosh in the known universe to pay her compenbloodysation for all the flak.
   Or is she guilty and a useless, blundering system got the right answer entirely by accident. We should be told. But probably won't be.

"With power comes responsibility", we are told. But no worries for Labour. When it comes to shirking their responsibilities, they're top of the class.

The Department of Transport has been accused of trying to confuse the public about the number of on-street chargers for electric vehicles provided by local councils by putting deliberately false data on its website.
   No Xplanation is on offer other than the endemic ‘because they can'.

It’s what they do
Bier O'Tool's deputy, Angrier Raygun, is planning more devolution & regional power transfers based on the will of ever decreasing fractions of the electorate. No one surprised.
Reevesie is hell-bent on selling the UK out to the EFU. No one surprised.

Labour is to cancel the British first policy for council houses to give priority to illegal immigrants.

Creaky Joe was reduced to playing the Chinese plague card as his Xcuse for disappearing escape embarrassment. How desperate is that!
Democrap bossy-boots Nasty Pelosi has taken on the job orchestrating the Replace Creaky Joe process.

The O'Tool idea of a good deal is for the EFU to take back 40,000 boat invaders and for the UK to accept 100,000 migrant invaders from the EFU.

The Argonauts were in nearby Hamilton
Relentless defence made the Argos punt, blocked! Shambles! The TigerCats from the TA 9, straight to a TD. More defence. The Cats started Q2 @ the TA 18, FG, 0-10.
   A fumble by the Argos gave the Cats a defensive TD, 0-17. The Argos reached the TC 11, TD run, 7-17. Almost but not quite a successful end zone pass by the Cats as the half ended.
   A 43-yard FG 3 minutes in to Q3 got the Argos to 10-17. One for the Cats after 9 minutes, 10-20. A pass play from the TA 23 was barged into the end zone in the last minute of the quarter, 10-27. The Argos managed a rouge from a punt, then a determined drive produced a TD in the 11th minute of Q4, 17-27.
   Cor! A punt return in the 13th minute went to a TA TD! 24-27. The Cats had to punt, the catch was bogged but still Argos' ball. Under a minute to get to FG range, no cigar.

Paris, host of the upcoming Olympics, is having trouble attracting visitors to a city with a plague of bed bugs, the river Seine full of sewage & stinking, and the streets full of dossing & stroppy migrants & homeless people.

Many people are struggling to see a difference between ‘normal' NHS service & the aftermath of the Windows bug & security update combination.

“Who the hell gives a rodent's bum about the kid who shot @ Donald Trump having pix of Princess Kate on his phone? Especially now he's dead and no threat to anyone any more.” Aine Fine

A Prize for Pointlessness goes to the tree-hugging championship held near Loch Sunar in the Scottish Highlands yesterday.

Q: Does Bier O'Tool saying he wouldn't let a family member have essential private medical treatment prove he's a wolf in sheep's clothing?
A: Nope, it just confirms he's a miserable ratbag in creep's clothing.
Q: When a Home Office bloke sez the government is treating the threat of easy to buy & lethal crossbows as a real priority, how seriously should we take that?
A: As seriously as all the stop the boats claims.
Q: Is anyone convinced by a hottest day of the year confected in the heat-trap that is central London?
A: Yawn.

More from the Sherie mailbag
“Whatever happened to all the cultural appropriation nit-pickers? You've got all these fake Arabs in their fancy scarf plus face mask grotting around and not a word from the Sombreroistas. Which just confirms what we already knew about them—that they're just a buncha pointless pillocks.” Pert Peary
“Rather like the Xtinctionists & their claim that climate change will kill BILLIONs of people over the next couple of decades and make their carbon emissions fantasies go away at a stroke. Let us hope they get priority when the Grim starts Reaping.” Drave Dagen
“Checked up, it was SIX billion bodies they were claiming. Cue a population Xplosion of carrion crows and a mass Xtinction of them when they've eaten all the human carcases.” Stokley Abhorin

Same naff product, just a different creepy front man Same stuff on offer Same outcome inevitable Romiley Pharma Megastore, 113/5 Riverside Drive

The Met Office has so much time on its hands that it has been able to dig into its archives and confirm that the weather on St. Swithen's Day (July 15th), rain or shine, has never ever stayed the same for the next 40 days.

Below the line mission statement: Some of the above is true. BFN is recognized as a premiere class observational blog and a multiple winner of the OB of the Year award.
   We are constantly exposed to dodgy conclusions drawn from dodgy data by the 'experts', especially those found in the world of politics and especially those at the Treasury and in opposition and running trade unions.
   Some of us civilians at BFN like to join in to let them know that anyone can do it and we ain't impressed by their efforts.

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Created for Romiley Anarchists' League by workers in revolt against oppression to set the record straight in the 3rd millennium. © RAL, July MM24 like anyone cares.