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A recycled Merry Xmas & a Good New Year
The Great Daily Mail Xmas Swindle!
What was sent was an almost invisible pair of earrings for someone with pierced ears. Can anyone spot the diamonds?
Will the coroner who declared the canoe-scammer John Darwin dead in 2003 lose his job for incompetence? Or will he be kept on the books in case scotch gordon broon needs to pull the same amnesia trick over his manifold disappearing acts?
More spin instead of substance
21st century policing in action?
New technology = new opportunity for criminals
Another brown hand in your pocket
The Truth Will Out
The government's insistence on a ban on smoking in pubs is killing the planet. Smokers driven out of doors are basking in the warmth of the patio heaters that landlords were obliged to install to keep their customers. But the heaters are belching vast amounts of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere; a problem which would not have arisen if our nanny state had listened to good advice and permitted pubs 'n' clubs to offer smoking rooms.
The truth is what the government wants it to be
Dream on, scotch!
Same old, same old
A waste of our time and our money
A character actor who enjoyed long-running success in TV sitcoms has died at 74. He was persuaded by his mother to go into acting, instead of becoming a doctor, and he became an established performer in 'light' productions including musicals and reviews. He appeared in films, including The Day of the Jackal (1973), and he had a successful stage career as an actor and a director. He starred in the 1980s TV sitcom Fresh Fields, which won an Emmy, and then May to December (1999-94), and his TV credits also include Midsomer Murders.
A prolific writer and anthologist has died at 67. He began his career in journalism then joined the publisher New English Library as an editor. He went freelance and then became a full-time writer. He was noted for reviving books and stories by forgotten authors, and for unearthing previously unpublished stories by authors of Ray Bradbury's ilk.
A prolific composer of experimental works has died at 79. He embraced electronic music in the 1950s and 1960s, and created his own musical vocabulary, which required copious explanation. He achieved cult status on the basis of work created up to the 1970s, and he had a habit of writing without regard for the practicalities of performance or the stamina of the audience. He spent the last 30 years of his life working on the world's longest opera, Licht, which is designed to be performed over 7 days and last a punishing 29 hours. There was a built-in degree of inaccessibility in his work, which encouraged the pretentious to feel superior to those who chose not to get involved with it.
A pioneer of rock & soul, and one of their bad boys, has died at 76. He is known equally for the music that he made with his sometime wife, Tina, and for battering her. She got her own back via a successful solo career and an exposé autobiography (which was turned into a knocking-job film). Ike played piano and guitar, for which he won awards, and did a lot of drugs and messing about with weapons, which got him gaol time. He eventually cleaned up his act and revived his career, and he was able to carry on working right up to his death.
The once-proud world-beating British chemical company has been dismembered gradually over the last few decades. The rump has now fallen into the clutches of Akzo Nobel of the Netherlands.
One of the dwindling band of jazz greats had died at 82. This Canadian composer and wizard of the keyboard played with everyone worth knowing in the jazz world. He began his recording career in the 1930s and built up an impressive catalogue of original works and Oscar Peterson plays . . ., featuring the works of other composers.
The first woman democratically elected as prime minister of a Moslem country died at an election rally in Rawlpindi. Ms. Bhutto was sacked twice from the job of prime minister over corruption allegations, she and her husband (b.k.a. Mr Ten Per Cent) stashed billions in Switzerland and the Isle of Man, and her governments were seen as largely ineffective.
Is the labour party clever enough to sacrifice a few pawns by soliciting illegal cash donations to the party's funds as a way of digging its fist deeper into the taxpayer's pocket? scotch gordon certainly looks like he's getting up the nerve to steamroller through Parliament, a bill giving political parties as much cash as they can handle out of the public purse.
Yet another shameful example of brown values
Another swindle on the way
High Street Robbery!
Screw the customer
Shivering in their boots
A one-man calamity
Some bugger is telling porkies
Seek & Destroy!
to HM the Queen for becoming Britain's oldest monarch. If she can keep going until 2015/09/09, she will beat Queen Victoria's record as the longest serving monarch.
labour's mean-spirited attempts to end fox-hunting with dogs to give the toffs one in the eye have collapsed in failure. The 2005 Act lies in ruins in the Appeal Court, where it was judged to be so badly drafted as to be unenforceable.
Home Office Update
In the national interest?
Only under a labour government
They knew it was wrong but they did it anyway
Hands up . . .
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
New on the World Wide Web This brilliant resource which exposes Nigerian-type 419 scams, bogus lotteries & job offers, phishing attempts and much, much more!
Misheard TV news headline:
Misheard TV news headline #2:
Toy manufacturers are using the tactics of paedophiles against kids in chatrooms. They're putting employees online to pose as kids to groom genuine kids into buying the company's products. The companies are also using psychologists to come up with lines which the groomers can pass on to kids to increase their 'Buy This Toy' pester-power with their parents.
Unwanted Xmas cards
brown enters the spirit of the Web!
In the Eagles/Cowboys NFL match in Dallas on 2007/12/16, the officials failed to issue penalties for a helmet-to-helmet assault by a Cowboys' defender, which put an Eagles' player out of the match; a facemask grab by one of the Cowboys; a spike by J. Jones of the Cowboys; and one the Cowboys running into the Eagles' punter. They also slowed the Eagles down with a totally bogus false start penalty.
So far, so perfect!
Truckers are threatening to bring Xmas shoppers to a standstill with a mass protest against fuel prices. The government, which has made British fuel the most expensive in Europe with its stealth taxes, brought in laws to deprive militant truckers of their livelihood after the 2000 fuel protests. So there should be some interesting pictures for the TV news services if the protest goes off.
It's open house, come and go as you please
Going to Afghanistan isn't a junket
Don't move; you know it makes sense!
Somewhere else to avoid!
Ten years of scotch gordon as chancellor have reduced the Royal Navy to a small shambles with ageing and defective ships. The Navy couldn't even repeat it's limited role in the 2003 Iraq War now, and defending the Falklands? Forget it! Too much cash has gone on 'big toys' projects, which are always delivered late and vastly over budget.
What else are they lying about?
The perils of arty-craftism
Yanks shooting their mouths off!
One quick snort and you're out!
Bunch of bloody trouble-makers!
They don't like it up 'em!
What are they thinking?
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
BlackFlag News plans to launch a social networking website for people who don't use the Internet. "Why should these people be left out?" our Editor asks.
Watch this space for further details!
Pres Putin of Russia must be frowning over the result of the constitutional referendum in Venezuela, in which Pres Chav's mighty electoral machine was outmatched by opposition forces which didn't have a fist sunk deep into the public purse. The people said a slender 'No!' to the notion of Pres Chav for life. Will Putin be able to get away with the same deal?
Shiver in your shoes, you Cockneys!
A blast from the past
Thanks a bunch!
Like a thief in the night
Operation Image Polish
The Insolence of Office
Great idea; if they can make it work!
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