|Downloadable versions, £2.50 a pop|
The Met Office is facing charges of Triumphalism after rubbishing a forecast by a rival weather service of temperatures dropping to around -17 deg.C during the first week of the month. Under the new labour business code, being right is no excuse for taking excessive delight in pointing out a competitor's blunders.
I told you so!
BlackFlag News is pleased to re-announce that this ground-breaking work by one of Romiley's most distinguished authors can be read on-line. This is the way recycling has to go!
Category : The future of recycling in a violent & lawless society.
Marinus van der Lubbe, the Dutch arsonist who set fire to the Reichstag in 1933, has been given a cosmetic pardon under a German law passed in 1998. Criminals convicted during the Nazi regime are deemed to be innocent as Nazi laws 'went against the basic ideas of justice'.
From disgraceful to disgusting
What a surprise!
JUST PLAIN THEFT
Sauce for the goose . . .
One jump ahead of the Old Bill
It's him to blame
Who'd have thunk it?
Headline-grabbing but no beef
+ + + BOOK of the MONTH + + +
BlackFlag News is pleased to recommend this excellent collection.
The handy pocket-size softback is available from Romiley Bookstore, 101 Riverside Drive, for just £9.99 / €17.49 plus NO VAT because they don't believe in it.
The creator of the Flashman books has died at 82. He earned a crust as a journalist, working on The Scotsman and becoming deputy editor of the Glasgow Herald. He also wrote film screenplays, including those for several Musketeers films, Red Sonia and the Bond film Octopussy. But Mr. Fraser is best known for developing the career of the school bully in Tom Brown's Schooldays. As an army officer in Victorian times, Flashman had a licence to blunder around the world, winning fame and fortune by accident.
The Toshiba system for high-definition DVD players has been declared dead in the water following a decision by Warner Brothers to release their films only for the Sony Blu-ray system from later this year. Both systems provide pictures of the same quality but Sony's player costs 50% more than Tosh's.
The world's most famous mountaineer has died at 88. He is still officially credited with being the first human to stand on the summit of Mount Everest; he is certainly one of the first to do so and live to tell the tale. He and Tensing Norgay completed their climb of Everest just a few days before our present Queen's coronation in 1953.
The man who gave the world the Hula Hoop has died at 82. He founded the Wham-O Toy Company with his pal Arthur 'Spud' Melin in 1948 and supplied the citizens of southern California with boomerangs, catapults, crossbows and other sporting goods at first. Then the company took a walk on the wild side. As well as Hula Hoops, it also made popular Silly String, the Frisbee (which was originally called the Pluto Platter by its inventor), the Superball and lots of other fun gadgets.
The weirdo chess wizard has died at 64. He began his chess career at 6 and won the US adult championship for the first time at 14. His tactics included making his opponents squirm and trying to crush the other guy's spirt. He became an American hero when he beat the Soviet champion Boris Spassky in 1972.
The minister for fake tans was booted out of his two jobs as the police launched yet another investigation into labour party finances. The prime monster tried to explain why hain's failure to declare £103,000, some of it from dodgy sources, of the £200,000 which he raised for a spectacularly unsuccessful labour deputy leadership bid. But the best that old scotch could manage was that hain isn't corrupt, he's just incompetent.
This Tory MP's smug world came unhooked when it was revealed in the tabloid press that he had been paying a small fortune in salaries to his two sons, who had been recruited as research assistants while away at university. In the absence of any record of what they did in return for a total of £83,000, Conway received a slap on the wrist from the Commons. But his party boss, Dave the Leader, expelled him from the party in a cloud of indignation. So when scotch gordon finally summons the nerve to go to the country, Degsy will be history.
The nation's favourite prankster and a charity fund-raising champion has died at 59. Jeremy Beadle was a serial practical joker, who burst into the nation's consciousness as one of the four presenters of Game For A Laugh, which was essential viewing during the 1980s. He pursued his talent for making people do daft things in Beadle's About and You've Been Framed, and he threw himself into charity work when his TV bubble burst, raising over £100 million, for which he received an MBE in 2001.
This author, humorist and broadcaster has died at 66. His freelance writing credits include Punch and doing daily newspaper columns. He also worked for BBC radio & television and created numerous books. He became well known for his Let's Parler Franglais! series; a mock study course based on the way French has become anglicized. He also published a Latin phrase book with his own translations of familiar words and expressions. Collections of his newspaper articles have appeared in book form and his busy life also included being a jazz musician and performing in TV travel features.
Ever eager to spread the tax load, the government has come up with a couple of new taxes for local councils to impose on their customers:
Phrase of the Month
The future involves a bright, radioactive haze
Another fix on the way
Any old excuse will do
It's only taxpayers' cash
It's only taxpayers' cash II
A scoundrel wrapped in the flag!
Something else scotch gordon, the man who pretends to be the epitome of Britishness, is to blame for evicting Britannia from the tails side of the next issue of 50p coins.
From this month, only healthy people will have access to the full range of NHS services. Anyone who's fat and/or a smoker will be told to push off and come back when they're slim and/or nicotine-free for 3 months.
This Comes As No Surprise Department
Good News, Bad News
You, too, could live forever!
The easy way to lose weight!
Every breath chokes you!
Just a thought . . .
You just can't win!
Diana's Ditch, the overblown and badly designed & engineered 'memorial' in Kensington Gardens, is sinking and needs rebuilding, according to a bloke who used to work for the firm that was called in to sort out its problems. Alternatively, it would be renamed blair's bog and left as it is as a fitting monument to the nation's other people's princess.
Word of the Month
Slogan of six months ago
Is that any better?
What does the sign on tony blair's desk say?
Believe it or what?
The Big Lottery Fund is supposed to distribute money to good causes. So why has it given £250,000 to the Trivial Democrats running Stockport Council for a project to "improve the way staff manage moods". £883 million has gone to other councils for similar abuses of the system.
Brag and move on?
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
New on the World Wide Web This brilliant resource which exposes Nigerian-type 419 scams, bogus lotteries & job offers, phishing attempts and much, much more!
"The US is faced with a miserable choice of candidates for the president's job. About the only one who has made a worthwhile contribution to society is that McCain bloke, who invented oven chips. So maybe he should get the job."
As peter hain exits stage left, pursued by the Old Bill, it would probably be quicker to list the cabinet members who aren't under investigation for dodgy fund-raising. Alan Johnson, another former labour deputy leadership hopeful (a john prescott wannabe?) was next into the frame for dodgy goings-on. But he's also saying he's innocent, so everything is okay.
A remarkable lack of noise!
Train fares have gone up so much that it's now cheaper for two people travelling from Bristol to London to take a joint taxi for the trip. The government says it wants travellers to pay more for the railways; which means it will continue to tax people at the same level, but it will waste the money on something else other than railway infrastructure.
Govt. gets tough with mobile criminals. Maybe.
Too tough to handle
The Daft Things You Think
We're getting there
No surprise here, then!
No our fault, Gov!
Dangerous drivers on the loose!
Apparently, the Iranian government thinks it's "ordinary" for its Republican Guard nutters to threaten to blow up American warships in the Persian Gulf with suicide speedboats. So it sounds like they're crazy enough to be trusted with nuclear weapons in the looney bin which the current Middle East has become.
A firm in Arizona has made a breakthrough in the field of personal protection devices. Taser International is now selling a high-voltage zapper which doubles as an MP3 player when the threat level is close to zero. Customers are advised to keep a close eye on their battery level to make sure that they have enough power to deal with a sudden emergency.
More good news for music-heads! (sort of)
How bleedin' Gallic of them!
Nazi Germany the new model for the European Parliament?
Preserved for posterity
|Created for Romiley Anarchists' League by workers in revolt against oppression.|
Sole © RAL, January 2008. Free web counters are available from www.digits.com