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 2015/October 
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Please Note:
The Following presentation may contain stunts and experiments which should not be imitated – so that you never realize just how easy they are to do.

 EU NEWS 

Busted flush
The Yes to Europe campaign was launched by Lord Rose, who was a sceptic 6 months ago, and he immediately shot himself in the foot with a shower of dodgy and rubbishy statistics. Even worse, he has to line up with proven liars like the Mandelsleaze and Tony B. Liar, and Richard Branson, who doesn't live in the UK any more, is also on the team.
   Even worser, every piece of praise that Rose heaps on the EU can be countered out of his own back-catalogue of public pronouncements on the EU's deficiencies. And even worse than that, he's surrounded by the people who waged a campaign of lies and smears to try to get Britain into the eurozone, which would have ruined our economy.
   Not that much for the Leave campaign to do, then.

More ammo for the Leave campaign
The EU wants to waste lots of money and pollute the countryside with billboards thanking the Countryside Stewardship scam for giving British taxpayers' cash back to farmers. The European Commission wants some grovelling gratitude from the recipients of the scam – when, in fact, the reverse is due.
   After all, the cash comes from the pockets of British taxpayers, who fork out over £10 BILLION per year more than they get back from the EU, and even more money could be spent on looking after the countryside if the European Commission didn't grab a big chunk of it before the cash is repatriated, and insist that some of what is left is wasted on pointless EU propaganda.

 CLIMATE NEWS 

global warming sloganExceeding job parameters
The Bank of England boss, M. Carney, tried to bring the Global Warming Swindle religion into his job by proclaiming that global warming is a tragedy on the horizon for the global economy. He had to be reminded that it is the so-called green policies of the EU and Dave the Leader, which are suffocating economies via green taxes, which present the greatest threat of another financial crash.

global warming sloganUnskilled labour
Senior judges and lawyers from around the world held a conference in London this month. Their subject was Climate Change and the Law. The conference was funded by British taxpayers and the UN, but the organizers have refused to disclose the names of the participants, which is highly suspicious.
   Why? Because the agenda was a search for ways to make it illegal for governments, companies and even individuals to question the IPCC's phoney consensus that the human race is causing global warming through the use of fossil fuels. The United Nations Organization is all about politics, not science, but it is clearly asking too much for judges to realize this.
   Worse, the anonymous participants at the jamboree were looking for ways to oblige all nations to stop using fossil fuels.
   Especially in recent years, our judges have taken it upon themselves to rule that the Law is the reverse of that which emerges from the nation's Parliament. Thus it comes as no surprise that these self-important but uninformed arbiters would choose to step into the field of religion dressed up as science.
   Good luck in making China and India close down their coal-fired power stations, fellers. Especially as India has decided to triple its carbon dioxide emissions by 2030.

global warming sloganRub on the snake oil
Surprise! Data from the UK Met Office's own recording stations shows that there has been no change to Britain's temperatures, rainfall, etc., over the last 18 years. What about the Met Office's predictions of hotter drier summers and warmer, wetter winters? And that claim that we can expect a general increase in summer temperatures due to human influence on climate? Just global warming swindle moonshine.

 DOSH NEWS 

More cash for usual suspects
The small-print-loaded scam to charge 5p for a plastic bag came into force this month. The Treasury will claim 1p as VAT, a proportion of which will end up in EU coffers, and the rest will go to good causes; and to pay the salaries of charity executives who are getting multiples of the prime monster's salary, of course.

It's only taxpayers' cash
The county council for Cornwall is planning to blow £150,000 on making staff learn approved phrases in Cornish just in case they happen to bump in to one of the 464 residents who claim Cornish as their first language.

 WAR NEWS 

Political posturing
Enoch Powell's so-called "rivers of blood" speech (he didn't say that) was an opinion delivered by an educated man which has been persistently distorted by ignorant political opportunists. So is anyone surprised that Asian politicians are trying to get Dave the Leader to apologize for it? [That's the distorted version rather than the actual speech. Ed.] Dave, to his credit, has thus far resisted the temptation to do a Tony B. Liar. [But you never know with Dave. Ed.]

black squareJ. Chilcot, the Iraq war report foot-dragger, and T. Watson, Labour's new deputy leader, will be having a punch up to decide who is the man with least shame in Britain.

What has New Labour done to the police?
The Metropolitan police farce has admitted that it refused to announce, whilst he was still alive, that there was no case against Lord Brittan for historic sex crimes. The Blairite bosses were worried that they would be accused of incompetence by the meeja and the public.
   [And failure to manufacture some evidence? Ed.]

Mr. Liar is a liar: it's official!
The smoking gun memo has surfaced to prove that Tony B. Liar made an agreement with George Dubya Bush to start a war in Iraq back in 2002, a year before hostilities commenced and whilst he was still claiming that a diplomatic solution to the Saddam Hussein problem was still possible. No surprise, though.

It wisnae me!
The truth about the Iraq war can now be told. Everyone else got it wrong, but not Tony B. Liar, who has issued an insincere apology for everyone else's blunders.

We need the practice
The US is to use Syria as a live-fire training zone for its special forces. This is the obvious conclusion to draw from the plan to send teams 30-50 strong to the badlands of the Middle East as the latest twist of the war against terror. There will also be operations against IS terrorists in Iraq.

world news
 WORLD NEWS 

When in doubt, double up
It has been fashionable to pretend that an asteroid impact 65 million years ago wiped out the dinosaurs and made the world available to mammals. But there has been a strong lobby for the Deccan Traps; volcanoes in North India; as the game-changers as they erupted continuously for some 30,000 years around 66 million years ago. Now, the asteroidals have leapt back into the fray with a claim that it was their asteroid impact which set off the volcanoes. Nothing like having the best of both worlds.

Who's cheating over vehicle emissions?
Citroen, Fiat, Hyundai, Nissan, Renault and Volvo have all had fingers pointed at them, and they've all been added to the Volkswagen roll of dishonour. Tests in the UK have found that emissions results in the real world for both petrol and diesel engines are 35% greater than those from manufacturers' laboratory tests.

We're evil, we know it and we don't care!
Anxious to retain its status as the world's most repugnant regime, the Chinese government has stressed that 'uman rights will not be discussed during this month's presidential procession in Britain.

I'm just a pit bissed
The latest theory about the Aussie accent is that the early British settlers/convicts were permanently blootered and the Aussie accent reflects the effect on generation after generation of kids of parents trying to speak English whilst sloshed.

Bent. Just plain bent, all of them
Sepp "Mr. Corruption" Blatter has admitted that the venues for the 2018 and 2022 World Cups were fixed before the voting took place. England's FA, which wasted £21 million on a bid which had no chance, is now demanding its money back. The 2022 World Cup was originally booked for the US but Michel Platini, head of UEFA and suspended for a corruption investigation, chose Qatar instead, according to Blatter.

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Crime News
 CRIME NEWS 

We are criminals but we're okay

Three Libyan soldiers, who were gaoled for drunken sex offences whilst on training courses here, are now claiming asylum; at the taxpayer's expense, of course. So what is Dave the leader doing about his pledge to junk the 'Uman bluddy Rights Act and replace it with a British bill of rights? Apart from bugger all?

Failure to Connect
A con-man and his wife have been gaoled for stealing over £40,000 from an elderly neighbour. But the remarkable thing about the case is that A. Knight avoided being taken to court for two years by pretending to be in a coma. Which raises the question of why the police took so long to rumble him, given that they knew they were dealing with a con-man.

When in doubt, cheat
The Lincolnshire police farce is the rudest to the public in England and Wales. As a result, the system for recording complaints is to be "overhauled" to reduce their numbers dramatically.

Not the message we wanted!
“Three more years for Met boss” said the headline. Unfortunately, that's three more years in the job for Hulk Hogan Hyphen Howe rather than three more years in gaol.

Just plain shameless
The Metropolitan police farce knew that the sex crime allegations against former home sec. L. Brittan were a load of rubbish, and being promoted by the current Labour deputy leader out of political spite, well before Mr. Brittan died in January of this year. But they decided to say nothing until now. Is it any wonder that no one trusts the police any more and the reappointment of Quad-H as Met boss for another 3 years was met with such a profound lack of enthusiasm?

black square It has been suggested that we need an MoT for judges to oblige them to prove that they are competent and have some contact with reality.

Just plain wastrels
The Metropolitan police farce has abandoned its 3-year siege of the Ecuadorian embassy after wasting £12 MILLION of taxpayers' money. Bail fugitive J. Assange, the Wikileaker, is now free to show his face on the streets of London and hope some copper doesn't recognize him. Of course, there is no guarantee that the £12 MILLION is the bottom line. Some genius at Scotland Yard is now plotting to blow further millions on covert surveillance and the farce will go on.

Just plain not there
The new chief constabule (£185K) of the Greater Manchester police farce has announced that he is not interested in burglaries unless the thieves are still loading up their van, and thefts of mobile phones will be ignored completely. Under his ministry, the farce will concentrate on handing out crime numbers and doing social work with anti-social problem families.

Home News
 HOME NEWS 
UK Flag

How strange
Lord Lawson, sometime Tory Chancellor under Margaret Thatcher and currently on offer as a figurehead for a 'leave the EU' campaign, is an out-dom; he has abandoned Britain in favour of a home in France. So does that make him a totally disinterested participant in the Great Debate?

black square Three-quarters of all UK adults will be overweight by 2025, according to the World Obesity Forum. BFN would put it a bit sooner, like December 27th 2015!

Another Bliar Blunder
The legacy of the 2012 Olympic games in London, which was advertised as costing £3 BILLION but cost £9 BILLION, is that 3 years later, 400,000 fewer people are engaged in sporting activities. But the good news is that a lot of usual suspects did walk away with their pockets bulging with taxpayers' cash.

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Far Queue List

Far Queue symbol C. Church (what was she doing on the BBC's Question Time? apart from filling a Luvvie slot), who thinks the Syrian civil war was caused by the Great Global Warming Swindle.

Far Queue symbol Robert self-obsessed Peston and his pantomime antics.

Far Queue symbol The Greater Manchester police farce has decided to ignore completely all hate crimes which are perpetrated by looney lefties and aimed at Tories.

Far Queue symbol Zac Goldsmith.

Far Queue symbol J. Heywood, cabinet secretary and self-appointed Tsar for Covering Up, objects to people using his nickname of "Cover-Up".

Far Queue symbol D. Walker, the bishop of Manchester, will not be housing any refugees at his palatial residence for "cultural reasons". Any old excuse, eh?

Far Queue symbol Valentino Rossi, the Michael Schumacher of MotoGP.

Far Queue symbol “Far queue, far queue very much!” – Frank Zappa.

The Far Queue: the traditional parking place for everything "not wanted on voyage".

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Created for Romiley Anarchists' League by workers in revolt against oppression
to set the record straight in the 3rd millennium. © RAL, October MM15.