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 2014/February 
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A shining beacon of enlightenment in an era of Tory/Labour/Leftie-luvvie censorship and attempts to cover up their often unsavoury and frequently criminal activities.

Romiley News
ROMILEY NEWS
 

Vote for Dave and a Referendum  

Our prime monster has been writing to selected Romiley residents to encourage them to opt for a postal vote. He believes that having it will give them peace of mind and help him to give the nation an in/out referendum on membership of the European Union, and that people voting Tory instead of UKIP in this year's Euro-elections will frighten the European Union into "working for Britain".
   That's a referendum in 2017, if Dave is still prime minister.
   And that's a personal pledge/promise to deliver a referendum – unless it turns out to be yet another of Dave's firm promises which goes up in smoke when the time to deliver arrives . . .

 DOTTY BISHOPS NEWS 


Some kind of new mathematics?
If everyone is starving and having to rely on food banks for their next meal, as the nation's bishops would have us believe, how come Britain is struggling with an OBESITY crisis?

 POWER NEWS 


How dare you criticize us!
+ + + British Gas declares war on UK customers + + + Stop moaning about being ripped off or the lights will go out, BG warns + + + And shut up about fat-cat energy bosses on inflated salaries + + + And don't even think about breaking up Centrica + + + So what if the wholesale price of gas has gone down? That's no reason for British Gas to drop its prices + + +

Crime News
 NOT A CRIME NEWS 

Judges get it right for once

The High Court has ruled that it is perfectly lawful to arrest a data mule in possession of stolen Intelligence data, even if the mule is trafficking the data on behalf of a leftie-luvvie organization like theGrauniad or one of its hirelings. The only surprising aspect of the affair is that the data mule wasn't locked up like any common or garden drug mule would have been.

 HIJACK NEWS 


"There's no one here to take your call . . ."
The Swiss air force was unable to provide any fighters to lurk pointlessly near a hi-jacked airliner when it entered that country's air space this month. The unscheduled flight arrived in the early hours of a Monday morning, and the air force is on a strict 9-to-5 timetable as an economy measure.
Despite this setback, the airliner landed safely and the criminal at the controls was duly busted and ignored as he lodged a spurious claim for asylum.

 HEALTH NEWS 


One way to get there
The Department of Health is attempting to move "voluntary" euthanasia one step closer by proposing that the elderly will be denied medical treatment if their "innings" can be classified as "fair". Those who will actually have to tell patients: "Hard luck, you're too old to be treated," are appalled by the crudity of the proposal.
Pensioners, or those approaching pension age after it has been raised, will be dismayed to learn that a "fair innings" is officially 70 years of life. Which could well be the pension age in a decade or two.
The DoH author of the proposal wishes to remain anonymous to avoid being the star turn at a lynching.

The Tony B. Liar "Kiss of Death" Advice . . .
. . . went to Rebekah Brooks (on trial for involvement in voicemail hacking), Silvio Berlusconi (chucked out of his prime minister's job, waiting to be hauled into court on criminal charges), Muammar Gaddaffy (chucked out of his dictator's job, done to death in a sewer pipe), Hosni Mubarak (lost his job as Egypt's president for life), Nicolas Sarcozy (lost his job as French president, waiting to be hauled into court on criminal charges), Wendi Deng (marriage to Rupert Murdoch exploded), and sundry others.

Mid-Staffs NHS Culture thriving in Labour Wales
The Labour party has been banging on about cuts, many of which are imaginary, but it has been strangely silent about the accusation that the Labour-run NHS in Wales is covering up high death rates due to its far from imaginary 11% cuts.

And they call this justice?
Mid-Staffordshire NHS Foundation Trust has admitted failing to look after its patients and letting them die, and so it faces a fine. Which means the government will move some cash from one taxpayers' pocket to another, and the guilty parties, who let it happen, will get away with it, as usual. Including the New Labour ministers, who presided over the shambles and who are now raking in the spoils of their period in office (if not responsibility).

 SELECTIVE JUSTICE NEWS 

Why have no bankers been prosecuted for fraud & misconduct?
Because G. Broon and E. Balls and A. Darling and the quangocrats of the extinct Financial Services Authority and the management of the Bank of England would have to be in the dock with them, and it would never do for politicians and their hirelings to be held accountable for their crimes against humanity.

 OLYMPICS NEWS 

If you go to Sochi . . .
. . .don't expect to be able to use the toilets, drink the water or switch on the lights. The Russians are reckoned to have spent £31.8 BILLION (more than the cost of all the previous winter Olympics put together) on this one. From the looks of it, about £31.6 BILLION was stolen by corrupt officials or paid out to the Russian Mob.
   The accommodation for visitors consists of a set of Potemkin Villages which feature "buddy bogs" for people who want to share their toilet experience. The water coming out of the taps is yellow and disgusting and highly dangerous, and where there should be light fittings, there are just wires hanging out of walls and ceilings. That's if you are lucky enough to allowed to be allowed to occupy a room booked months in advance, and the hotel has walls and floors. Rooms may not have doors. Doors may not have handles.
   Worse news awaits anyone who actually wants to buy tickets for events – they cost $1,000 apiece for some of them! And the opening ceremony featured a bunch of fake lesbian singers to prove to the world that Tsar Putin the First (and last) has nothing against poofters.
   The Russian deputy PM has been tasked with the job of creating "evidence" that all the cock-ups are the result of sabotage by visitors out to denigrate the former Soviet Union, and gangs of video technicians are working around the clock to fake CCTV footage of the saboteurs in action. And if the special effects and light shows for the opening ceremony don't work, no matter. Here's one we prepared earlier, which you can pretend was what you saw on the day.
   p.s. Dead bees in the packs of honey served in any restaurants and snack bars which are open are entirely optional.

Sochi, which is famous for not having snow, was picked as Russia's choice for the Winter Olympics as it is hot enuf for Tsar Vlad the Last to go topless for yet another in his series of personal publicity picture shoots.

Q: What do you get if you hold a winter Olympics at Sochi?
A: No snow since before the opening day and 6 deg.C temperatures melting and slushing what snow there is.

£19 BILLION of the £31 BILLION budget for the Sochi games "went missing" – a lot of it into the coffers of firms run by pals of Pres. Putin.

 FANTASY NEWS 

What planet does he come from?
"We are a wealthy country," our Walter Mitty prime minister, Dave the Leader, would have us believe. So he doesn't think money should be taken from the overseas aid budget to help British people up to their necks in floods. Does he know that the Labour party left the country deep in debt, which currently stands at £1.3 TRILLION — that's £1,300,000,000,000? And that his ring-fenced aid budget exists only because he's borrowing the money (probably from the Chinese) at fancy rates of interest to give it away — currently more than the defence budget of £61 BILLION? Obviously not.

Quiz Question
"As long as the molluscs are safe, the people can go to Hell" is the motto of which quango, which pays Lord Smiff £100K for being its figurehead, even though he is totally unqualified for the job (except by virtue of being a Labour luvvie) and knows nothing about looking after the environment and its inhabitants.

Man-made climate change? Where's the proof?
The storms of 2014 are rare but not unique. Similar weather has battered the British Isles before – and during periods when there were no claims of man-made global warming to blame, like the 17th century. And there was more rain in the winters of 1929/30 and 1914/15, which holds the record.

Headless chicken scheme for 2015
Labour has a secret plan to do the nation a favour. The Big Idea is to drown Clottish Clegg's constituency with Labour activists come the next general election and win his Sheffield constituency, leaving the Liberals leaderless and knowing that the rump will self-destruct violently in the scramble to fill the vacancy.

Not so super after all!
The Met Office used its super-duper computer and "cutting-edge science" to produce in November, a prediction that the 3 months from December 2013 to February 2014 would be exceptionally dry, especially in the West Country. And they still expect us to swallow their global warming predictions, which are made with the same "cutting-edge science".

world news
 WORLD NEWS 

More is definitely not better.
Are there too many bodies in the House of Commons? Not according to Clottish Clegg. He wants to see joint MPs doing job-sharing and special MPs with constituencies covering Britons living abroad in Europe and on the other 6 continents. All on generous travel allowances and expenses, of course. Naturally, Cleggy has nothing so say on where the cash to pay for all this extravagance will come from; but it has to be the poor old taxpayer. [Maybe he'll suggest raiding the overseas aid budget to pay for a personal jet for each of the World MPs to do their commuting. Ed.]
He also wants votes for 16-year-olds as he sees anyone older as being too wise in the ways of the world to be conned by Liberal flimflam.

"For you, ze war is over!"
The Afghan Taliban has not yet decided what to do with a captured British army working dog. The dog was lost in December during a fire-fight with terrorists. The possibilities appear to include ransom, release – or dinner if a North Korean diplomat happens to visit the Alingar Valley.

Any old excuse for waste
DEFRA, a.k.a. the Ministry of Agriculture, is wasting £4 million on killing Britain's ruddy duck population. They migrate to Spain and out-breed males of the rare white-headed duck species there. So it's Spain's problem that our dummox government is tackling. Except that even if the total British population of ruddy ducks is wiped out, they will still get to Spain from unmolested colonies in France and Holland. So British taxpayers' cash is being thrown at a problem which won't be solved by killing all the ruddy ducks living in Britain. But try telling that to the geniuses at DEFRA.

Good news for Scotland
The figurehead of the EU, J. Barroso, has decided that an independent Scotland will not be able to become a member of that monument to corruption, waste and bungled regulation, the European Union.
Bad news for Scotland: independence means goodbye to currency union with England and a Scottish pound independent of the pound sterling based in what's left of the Reduced Kingdom and even more at the mercy of the world's currency spivs.
Bad news for MPs elected in Scotland: they will lose their expenses, travel perks and other bonuses, and become even more irrelevant.

Don't trust him a millimetre
Gordon "The Man Who Stole Your Pension" Brown has warned the people of Scotland that their pensions are at risk if they go independent. The sub-text is that the English pay a big chunk of Scottish pensions, and it will no longer be available after a separation, but the suspicion remains that Brown could be up to further pension no-good.

More misery for Scotland?
If the Scots go independent, and replace the BBC with a Scottish Broadcasting Service, they'll be left out of the Eurovision Song Contest! The SBS will have to apply for membership of the European Broadcasting Union, and it might not get it. So the poor old Scots could be denied the honour of getting nul points.

Let's face it, Alex Salmond wants to be President of Scotland. Whether or not it's a good idea is irrelevant to him. It's all about scratching his ego. Me-me-me-me.

travel news
 TRAVEL NEWS 


"Easyjet is one of Europe's most punchable airlines"
Well, that's what it sounded like in the TV advert. Probably something to do with all the hidden extras swindles.

Just so you know
If you were wondering why you can't get past Dawlish in Devon on the London to Cornwall railway line, it's all the fault of the Environment Agency, which blocked protecting the railway from the sea.
   85 yards of sea wall were destroyed by one of this month's storms because the overpaid bumblers at the EA – there are over 12,000 of them costing the taxpayer £400 MILLION per year – were dragging their feet over cobbling together a report on the impact of strengthening the sea wall on the local wildlife.
   Their negligence will mean that the railway won't be back in action for at least 6 weeks and it will cost the local economy around £100 MILLION, or enough to pay for another 3,000 quangocrats for the Environment Agency.

If you want to be ripped off . . .
. . . book an hotel room in Yorkshire during the period when the Tour de France will be visiting in July. Cycling fans will find that prices are being marked up by between 3x and 5x normal rates to enhance their experience of good old Yorkshire hospitality.

Somewhere to avoid in March . . .
. . . would be H. Samuel, the jewellery chain, which is sticking up the price of everything made with gold by an enormous amount to make the month-end reductions for a sale look worth having. Don't be fooled!

In the taxpayer's interests
The Home office has been selling visas on the cheap to Russian and Chinese oligarchs. The going rate has been a paltry million quid up to now but the Migration Advisory Committee thinks it should be upped to £2.5 million. Which means that the fair price, from the British taxpayer's point of view, is probably around £5-10 million, given the general financial incompetence of the civil service.

 POLITICS NEWS 

There's always a dodgy motive
Why did Labour and the Liberals talk out the EU referendum bill in the Lords? Because they see the EU administration machine as a refuge for failed British politicians – Mandelsleaze, Kinnock, Clegg, etc. – and they don't want to sever this link to the gravy train.

Any old excuse
If N. Clegg is keeping up with 28,453 Twits on Twitter, when does he have time to do the job the taxpayer is paying him to do? Likewise E. Milipede (1,446 Twits), E. BallsUp (1,331 Twits) and H. Harperson (1,271 Twits). In contrast, Dave the Leader is studying the lives of a mere 331 twits. [Why? Ed.]

What does the chief executive of the charity Save The Children do that's worth a salary of £234,000 per year? Likewise the honcho of Marie Stopes International, who gets £294,000 per year?

Problem solved. Well, postponed.
Red Ed Milipede has slain the trade union dragon and given the Labour party back to the people. But his radical overhaul won't come into effect until 2019 at the earliest because Labour needs the money the unions provide to survive. And as Ed will be history by then anyway, the whole scam will be quietly forgotten.

Q: What do you get when the Environment Agency sacrifices people to create a wildlife paradise in Somerset?
A: Floods which kill off all the wildlife.

Wythenshawe and Sale East by-election result
Labour 15.6%, UKIP 5.0%, Conservative 4.1%, Liberal 1.4% (lost deposit)
Out of an electorate of 85,058, 2.1% opted for even less significant parties than the Liberals and 71.8% did not vote.

Home News
 HOME NEWS 
UK Flag

The stupidest headline of the month . . .
. . . starts: "130 years in gaol for gang". It's a totally meaningless number without a knowledge of how many there are in the gang and the full details of their sentences. It tells the reader absolutely nothing. It's pointless. It was in the Daily Mail. But you might have guessed that already.

The country's New Labour-created financial problems solved!
The Taxpayers' Alliance has studied official Whitehall accounts and found that government spending will waste £120 BILLION this year. The current budget deficit, thanks to Gordon Brown's expert handling of the economy, stands at £112 BILLION. So it could be wiped out at a stroke by preventing the nation's idiotic politicians from wasting so much money and stopping them from indulging in even more Brownian spending.
   The amount of cash wasted adds up to an astonishing 17% of the government's spending [Astonishing that it isn't more? Ed.] and the current total is 2½ times more than the amount that came out of a TA survey of cash wasted by the government for 2003.

Looks like common sense isn't needed for council work
Councils for the areas currently flooded for the next few months are planning to build more houses on their flood plains in Somerset, Surrey, Berkshire, the Thames Valley, etc. No corresponding plans for flood defences are on offer, of course.

 DOSH NEWS 

Too hot? No cash!
The taxpayer's saviour, Mr. I.D. Smith, has created a new temperature test, which will mean that the British taxpayer doesn't have to fork out a winter fuel allowance to pensioners living in hot countries, where they don't need it. A lobby group representing the deprived 100,000 is now preparing a case for an air-conditioning allowance on the grounds that people can die of excessive heat as well as excessive cold.

More New Labour compensation culture
A copper who smashed up a pensioner's car in a fit of sustained vandalism, which went viral on the internet, has been awarded the best part of half a million quid for constructive dismissal by an industrial tribunal.
   Ex-PC M. Baillon told the tribunal that, as a consequence of his own actions, he had become a laughing stock in the police "service". So they gave him a huge wodge of taxpayers' cash to soothe the hurt feelings of someone who behaved more like an hysterical thug than a guardian of the Queen's peace.
   Baillon's colleagues thought he had done something totally unacceptable and he was lucky to get away with it when he was cleared of misconduct by a Gwent Police internal "inquiry". Sounds like the colleagues had a point. Baillon accepts that he has "absolutely no prospect" of ever working as a police officer again. No bloody wonder!

Gardening leave
Coppers not working because of stress, but still getting full pay, are costing the taxpayer between £29 million and £36 million per year. Curiously, most of them are getting stressed in rural areas rather than cities.
More millions are due to go up in smoke in payments to coppers who were sacked illegally on age grounds by chief constables who didn't bother to check what the law requires.

Smaller, yes – but better?
The Royal Bank of Scotland has ambitions to be the best bank in Britain by following the lead of Barclays and Santander – closing branches and departments, and sacking 30,000 staff worldwide.
Update "Local, but not as we know it, Jim."
HSBC, a.k.a. the Hongkong & Shanghai Bank for Criminals, is pretending to be the world's local bank but it is also getting in on the closing branches racket. [Mainly because it has to find cash for inflated executive salaries and bonuses. Ed.] Any HSBC customers who can't do their banking online will just have to find another bank which still has branches where they are needed.

Pull the other one
An Italian cleaning lady got into trouble for throwing away pieces of "contemporary art" because she thought they were food debris left behind by the people who set up an exhibition. But the prize for bone-headedness goes to the insurance company, which went along with a €10,000 price tag for the junk.

Are prices shooting up unreasonably?
A Walls Vienetta used to cost £1.50 in Romiley's Sainsbury Local. It's now £1.90. We do know when we're being ripped off, Lord Sainsbury, and we won't be buying any more from you, thank you very much, as your Vienettas are now on the official Boycott List as there is no way a 27% price rise can be justified and there's no way you're giving value for money.

Unfit at any price
With a reported loss last year of £8.2 BILLION, the Royal Bank of Scotland's cumulative losses since it went bust have reached £46 BILLION – that's £1,500 out of the pocket of everyone in Britain thanks to Gordon Broon and New Labour's failure to regulate banking.
Lest we forget, this is the bank formerly run into ruin by Fred "The Shred" Goodwin, who was awarded a knighthood for "services to banking" by that financial genius Wee Gordie Broon. [Subsequently to be rescinded. Ed.]

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 CLIMATE NEWS 

global warming sloganChazzer, the Chicken Man
Prince Charles has come out on the side of the Great Global Warming Swindle [No surprise there. Ed.] with his wires thoroughly crossed. He accuses those who don't believe the Warmists have any idea how the Earth's climate works of being headless chickens, who have launched a barrage of sheer intimidation against "accepted scientific wisdom".
   His Chazzerness seems to be unaware that his "scientific wisdom" was concocted by people who can't explain why there has been no global warming since 1998, and whose notorious Hockey Stick graph predicted that the Earth's temperature would shoot through the stratosphere.
   He also seems not to realize that the whole man-made global warming scam was dreamt up for the benefit of crooked politicians in search of something to tax – like carbon dioxide – and that his "intimidated" experts are doing very nicely out of the GGWS, thanks you.

global warming sloganNot wanted on voyage
Lord Smith, a man with zero qualifications for his job, made a low-key visit to the approximate area of the flood zone, his first ever since the crisis began. He was careful to stay well away from anywhere actually under water and he tried desperately, if unsuccessfully, to avoid reporters. But he probably got a good lunch out of a visit which served absolutely no useful purpose at all.
Labour luvvie quangocrat on £100K for nominally working 3 days per week Lord Smiff has stated that he is proud of the havoc created by his Environment Agency's cack-handedness.

global warming sloganPickles takes leave of senses – official!
E. Pickles, communities sec. and minister for eating all the pies, would have us believe that diverting overseas aid to flooded Somerset is a bad idea because the flooding is caused by global warming. That's the global warming which stopped in 1998; for a reason the Global Warming Swindlers can't explain; and which shows no signs of resuming at a time when some climate experts are predicting a plunge into another minor ice age.
   Even worse, Mr. Pickles is convinced that pushing British taxpayers' cash into the pockets of corrupt officials and the bank accounts of dictators in the name of preventing global warming will actually do something positive to prevent flooding in Somerset in future years.
Singing from the same hymn sheet, Dame J. Slingo, chief scientist at the Met Office, would have us believe that climate change (with the implication that it's man-made) is behind this year's winter storms, none of which has exceeded past experience. Her bold statement was trotted out despite an admission from La Slingo that there is no definitive proof for her case. [Which suggests that she would like it to be so, so she's working on that basis come what may. Ed.]

Lord Smiff's Environment Agency spent £2.4 MILLION on PR and self-promotion in 2013 instead of spending it on dredging rivers and flood defences.

Lord Smiff, hypocrite that he is, wants to dump the blame for the floods on people who bought homes on flood plains, and the developers who built the homes, without taking his own share of the responsibility for the policy of building on flood plains pursued by a Labour government, of which he was a member.

global warming sloganAnother part of New Labour's legacy
The flooding of the Somerset Levels is due to Labour policy begun in 2005 by the then Floods Minister, E. Morley, who eventually went to gaol for expenses fraud. He made the Environment Agency's "No Dredging" policy even worse by blocking the construction of pumping stations and promoting artificial flooding, allegedly for the benefit of wildlife – which has been wiped out by the floods.
   Although the Environment Agency knew that it was breaching the human rights of the people whose homes and businesses would be flooded, it just ploughed on. As a result, the present government – which means the taxpayer – is now liable for paying out hundreds of millions of pounds in compensation to New Labour's flood victims. After the legal profession has pocketed a big wodge of cash, of course.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

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Crime News
 CRIME NEWS 

Surprise!

The member of the Independent Police Complaints Commission, who is supposed to be doing an investigation of police tactics during the 1984 miners strike as part of the Apology for Scaregill movement, used to work for a couple of Labour MPs back in the day. So she's totally impartial in a leftie sort of way. Which is nice to know.

Expect squeals of protest
The Justice Minister, C. Grayling, is planning to make it illegal for the police to hand repeat cautions to serial criminals and let them get away with it forever in the interests of massaging police crime statistics. The Association of Cheap Police Officers is believed to be organizing protests right away as they see this as a direct threat to their attempts to create a feelgood haze about crime rates. Apparently, ACPO believes that reducing the public's fear of crime, even if artificially and groundlessly, is much more important than preventing criminals from doing their dastardly deeds for real.

One down, probably none to follow
One of the Plodgate-Gategate-Plebgate conspirators has been gaoled for 12 months for misconduct in a public office. PC K. Wallis lied about witnessing the altercation between Tory chief whip A. Mitchell and DPG plods manning the Downing Street gates. Wallis is expected to spend a token couple of weeks in prison before being released on licence to return to his job.
   Internal police "service" disciplinary action is pending against other plods, but nothing much is expected to come of it, and there are no further criminal charges on the horizon. But then, what's the point of being a copper if you can't get away with stuff?

Four more of them
The Metropolitan police "service" has tried, but failed, to conceal the news that 4 DPG officers of the Plodgate squad are under investigation for allegedly swapping "extreme porn" on their mobile phones whilst on duty.
Update 3 of the 4 porn-plods will not be charged with any offence, the remaining porn-plod is still waiting to hear the same good news.

It's only taxpayers' cash, after all
The think tank The International Centre for Financial Regulation, [est. 2009 by G. Broon & E. Ballsup] gobbled up £3 MILLION of taxpayers' cash. It was closed in 2012 when huge gaps were found in the accounts. This month, the former chief operation officer, C. Taylor, is on trial for allegedly strolling off with 600 grand. Trust Broon 'n' Ballsie to find the right man for the job!

Better out than in?
Former Labour Europe Minister D. MacShane, who stole £13,000 from the taxpayer with fraudulent expenses claims, is out of gaol. He was sent down for six months. He actually did six weeks. Next stop, the House of Frauds?

Far Queue List

Far Queue symbol Prince Chazzer, the headless chicken man.

Far Queue symbol A. Neil, MSP, who claims that Mrs. Thatcher drove Scots (who invented whisky) to drink when she stopped subsidies from English taxpayers to loss-making heavy industry in Scotland. [It must be in the Guinness Book of Records as the world's shortest journey. Ed.]

Far Queue symbol Baroness Morgan (Labour), who thinks she's entitled to a permanent nose in the quango trough.

Far Queue symbol Anyone who moans about New Labour stooges getting the richly deserved push from quangoland.

Far Queue symbol BT, which has been fined and ordered to make refunds after ripping off customers with a directory enquires scam with rip-off rates.

Far Queue symbol D. Laws (Liberal), an expenses swindler who was sacked from the government in disgrace but who has wormed his way back in via cronyism, is moaning that sacking Labour stooges from quangos is undermining the cult of cronyism.

Far Queue symbol Financial genius V. Cable (very Liberal indeed), who cost the taxpayer £1 BILLION by ignoring advice from banking industry experts and selling off the Royal Mail at a share price way below the true value.

Far Queue symbol Labour stooges, who complain about a Tory government evicting Labour stooges from quango sinecures and undoing the politicization of the quangocracy created by New Labour whilst it was politicizing the civil service and all other areas of public life with infills of Labour stooges.

Far Queue symbol Dutch brewer Heineken, which wants to advertise Kronenbourg 1664 beer made in Manchester as French beer.

Far Queue symbol A. Jenkins, chief exec of Barclays, who thinks he can make it the "go to" bank by closing 400 branches.

Far Queue symbol Whoever is in charge of Santander bank's operations in the UK, which will soon be short of 139 branches after they are closed to improve customer service.

Far Queue symbol E. Milipede, who didn't take a pair of wellies when he went flood junketing to experience the catastrophe he helped to create when he was the Global Warming Minister and in charge of the Environment Agency's budget and setting quite stupidly unrealistic targets for cutting carbon dioxide emissions.
Global warming is the last refuge of the scoundrel, which explains why the boy Milipede is pretending that the floods constitute a crisis of national security, even though no one who knows anything about climate science is pretending that humans putting carbon dioxide into the atmosphere affects the jetstream, which brought so many winter storms to the British Isles. Still, it gets him away from immigration and the economy, both of which Labour screwed up royally when he was a cog in the government machinery.

Far Queue symbol The freeloading, free-spending management of the Police Federation and their secret overseas bank accounts.

Far Queue symbol Energy Sec. E. Davey (Liberal) and his hysterical rant against anyone who doesn't buy the Great Global Warming Swindle and the greatness of that monument to waste and corruption, the European Union. Not to mention his decision to skive off on maternity leave and abandon those caught up in the floods.

Far Queue symbol Prince William's plan to destroy the nation's ivory collection (which he doesn't own), even though it won't save a single elephant from poachers.

Far Queue symbol The BBC, which didn't like to trouble its customers with the distressing news about Labour's Paedophile Pals Three because Harperson, Dromey and Hewitt aren't Tories.

Far Queue symbol The nation's publicity-seeking bishops and their bogus hunger crisis.

Far Queue symbol Whoever gave 70-grand each to a pair of midget female coppers, whose hands are too small to hold a gun and whose bodies are too small for regulation body armour.

Far Queue symbol Cromer town council, which bans leaving pots of flowers on graves on 'elf & nazi grounds.

Far Queue symbol Whoever valued the collection of crumbs and food bits thrown out by the Italian cleaning lady at €10,000.

Far Queue symbol G. Osborne, currently pretending to be able to do the Chancellor of the Exchequer job, seems to have caught Brown-Balls Disease. He knows the country is ONE TRILLION QUID PLUS in debt thanks to New Labour but he's still offering unlimited cash – which we don't have – to bail out Ukraine that notorious den of corruption and fraudsters and latter-Soviet billionaires.

Far Queue symbol Judge J. Cutler, who enjoys being lenient to undeserving criminals.

Far Queue symbol Attorney General D. Grieve and everyone involved in giving amnesty to IRA killers and their helpers.

Far Queue symbol Attorney General D. Grieve for failing to give to British troops harassed by the Saville Inquiry and ambulance chasers, the same amnesty which terrorists and their helpers got.

Far Queue symbol "Far queue, far queue very much!" – Frank Zappa.

The Far Queue: the traditional parking place for everything "not wanted on voyage".

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Created for Romiley Anarchists' League by workers in revolt against oppression
to set the record straight in the 3rd millennium. © RAL, February MM14.