Feeling the need to send a message to the rogue asteroid community, and its rivals on Earth, the Russian government is planning to mess about with the asteroid Apophis, which will miss the Earth when it crosses our planet's orbit in 2029 and 2036. The most likely outcome of the messing about will be to increases the probability of a collision in 2036 from 3 in 1,000,000 to a dead cert, but the people doing the messing about will be dead by then and not bothered about taking out the odd country or two.
2009/12/19 Wot bloody Global Warming?
A reader writes on 2009/12/22:
A Copenhagen Christmas to all out readers!
Tiger Woods crashes his car into a tree in the middle of the night, no one is hurt except him, and the local police are all over him, even though no one reported a crime. It must be really reassuring for the good people of Florida to know that their local fuzz have so little real crime to investigate that they can waste their time stalking celebrities.
Jacks In Office jumped on
Good news on crime!
Bad people do bad things
An alternative to crime
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The son of posh Anglo-Irish parents, Richard Todd became a professional actor, then World War II interrupted his career. He joined up the day after war broke out, he received a commission in 1941, and he was one of the first British officers to land in Normandy during Operation Overlord. He resumed his stage career when peace broke out and starred on the big screen as real-life military heroes; notably as Wing Commander G. Gibson in The Dam Busters (1955), Major J. Howard in lengthy blockbuster The Longest Day (1962) and as Commander J. Kerans in Yangtse Incident (1957). He continued to work as a jobbing actor in films and TV when his star faded after the 1960s, and he was awarded the OBE in 1993.
The chief medical officer for the Brown regime in England has quit. He will be most remembered for his hysterical prediction that swine flu would kill off half the population and a monumentally screwed-up online job application system for junior doctors two years ago. A serial self-publicist, he always put the interests of New Labour before those of the medical profession and their customers.
The deep threat for the Cincinnati Bengals has died from injuries received after falling off the bed of a pickup truck during a domestic dispute with his fiancée. He was one of the Bengal's collection of 'bad boys' but he was seen more as easily led and redeemable than actually bad. He was drafted by the Bengals in 2005 and, after a period of off-field problems, he had become one of the stars of the team's corps of receivers. At the time of the accident, he was on injured reserve, having suffered a broken arm on November 8th during a match with the Baltimore Ravens. Henry and his fiancée, Loleini Tonga, had 3 children and they were planning to marry next year.
Iceland has gone bust, Britain under the leaden Brown Clunking Fist is effectively bust and Dubai is tottering because its neighbours won't prop up the regime. Now, Greece looks like following the other reckless spenders down the drain before Xmas if the EU doesn't come galloping to the rescue with an injection of taxpayers' cash for a serial scrounger.
Another great New Labour deal for the nation
All the friends you can buy?
Lunatics running the madhouse? Cynics, more like.
Nothing to worry about, guys!
It's official Brown Ain't Best
Global Warming Swindles for Dummies
Don't be left out of the business opportunity of the 21st century!
For more details call in at Romiley Global Warming Information Center, 32b Riverside Drive
The head of the Climate Research Unit at East Anglia University will be standing down during an investigation of the decade of emails hacked from his department. Although the emails show a culture of suppression of data which disproves man-made global warming, systematic distortion of data to 'prove' this basic theological element of the global warning swindlers' religion and tricks to prevent the release of data to Freedom of Information requests, the outcome of the investigation is expected to be nothing more drastic than the application of a couple of pints of greenwash.
Not so Wonderful Copenhagen
Copenhagen will cost £130 million and generate as much carbon dioxide as the whole of Afghanistan generates over the same period.
Shoot the Messenger?
We seem to have lots of time to waste
Don't panic, a solution will be along shortly!
Another scam from the Global Warming Swindlers
The same old riff-raff?
Now we know it's a con
Another Global Warming Swindle
Another Inconvenient Truth floors Scammer
One small cheer then a big frown
Sarko's "Matter of Survival" sunk
The 'Elf 'n' Nazi Xecutive has blown a quarter of a million quid of taxpayers' cash to prove that bowling alleys are terribly dangerous places. People who take a stroll down the alley could be injured by bowling balls or caught up in the machinery! And people who work in bowling alleys run the risk of industrial deafness.
More reckless spending
"Iran test-fires missile that could hit Europe", theGrauniad yelled in a headline. Then it blew the scare tactic by printing a map showing the missile's 1,200-mile range. The only bits of Europe in danger are half of Crete and some bits & pieces north of Turkey on the Black Sea coast.
Copenhagen deal "won't save the planet"
Joke of the Conference
China crashes Brown juggernaut
Shock Jock undone
The culture of swindling the public at the BBC persists. The Beeb has had to tick off one of its production companies for getting its staff to pose as 'real people' in programmes involving a test of buying & selling skills. The Beeb keeps such a close eye on its own programme material that the swindles weren't noticed until long after they had been transmitted.
Joke of the Month
One rule for us, another for them
The oppressed fight back!
The Doshan Bleeda of the Year Award . . .
The Italian police tried to take on high-speed crooks with a pair of 200 mph, £130K Lamborghini super-cars. But the size of the fleet has been cut in half by a dozey driver, who barged onto a motorway from a service station without checking for on-coming traffic and punted the super-car into a row of parked vehicles.
A Reader Emailed:
G. Broon, Britain's temporary prime monster, has been bitching at the Pakistani government for not catching Osama bin Laden. So maybe it would be a good idea for the Paqs to send their equivalent of the SAS to Londonistan to round up some of the Alky Ida members, who have received shelter and public funds from New Labour's multiculturalistas, and ask them where to look for the semi-mythical Mr. Laden.
Five British yachtsmen, kidnapped in the Persian Gulf by Iranian pirates, have been released after internse diplomatic pressure. Luckily, Pres. Dinnerjacket of Iran was too busy with his nuclear programme to trump up espionage charges against them.
FIFA is trying to come up with an officiating strategy for next year's World Cup which will prevent the French from doing any more cheating.
The United States' government is planning to pull out of Afghanistan in 2012, which means that all Alky Ida has to do is hide in Pakistan until then, and claim final victory as soon as the Yanks are gone.
You really are in deep, deep trouble when your war criminals are criminally stupid as well . . .
Blair admits he lied, but so what?
What more do we need to know
It's confirmed : Chilcot is a stitch-up
International murder & banditry
The Swiss, who are allowed to have a referendum or two, have voted to ban the addition of minarets to Moslem meeting places. Apparently, they look too much like ballistic missiles for the traditionally neutral Swiss to stomach.
Another French swindle on the way
Another useless liar
Anything to swindle the taxpayer a bit more
The Italian Mystery
Not much of a Xmas event to look forward to!
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