A recycled Merry Xmas & a Good New Year
Barrow, Alaska In the last gasp of the month, the Daily Mail printed pictures of a bloke being chased around parked vehicles by a polar bear and just managing to escape into an unlocked truck. Which raises the obvious questions:
The next Olympic Games is going to have to be the first of a new generation of Affordable Olympics. Out will go costly sports like hurling a javelin or a discus, in will come affordable events like "Hurl the Shoe at the Politician". Shopping is also going to have to be elevated to Olympic level as a sport so that Olympic hopefuls will get the economy humming when they go to supermarkets on training sessions.
Poland gets to host a mega conference on climate change this month. 11,000 delegates & staff will spend a fortnight in Poznan talking about sliding cash extracted from the people who pay for the UN into the pockets of the people who don't pay for it; and the usual spivs, of course. They'll also be generating 15,000 tons of carbon dioxide to help the globe to get a bit warmer something it's not actually doing this century.
A tough time ahead for the power & communications industries
NIMBY Agency Thwarted
Another sneaky stealth tax in the wind
Shiver harder to stay warm?
Is the Global Warming industry sub-contracting its statistics to the British Home Office?
Any trick will do if you're desperate
O.J. Simpson, the former NFL star running back and actor, has been gaoled for 15 years for armed robbery while trying to recover memorabilia which took a walk. This is seen as pay-back for being perceived to have got away with a double murder. The jury and the judge denied it, but that did them no good.
Second thoughts about the "Villains' Charter"
A grab too far!
Oh, no! Not another type of crunch!
Archbish of Canterbury exposes the real scotch gordon
No wonder the prisons are bulging at the seams
The Japanese vehicle manufacturer has dropped out of the top level of world motorsport. The firm was unable to build a competitive car, much to the frustration of drivers Jenson Button & Reubens Barrichello, and the management has decided that Honda can't afford to throw £300 million at another losing season.
The world's greatest science-fiction fan, and one of the world's greatest collectors, has died at 92. He even coined a name for the genre, drawing a parallel from hi-fi to sci-fi. He moved from fanzine publisher to literary agent, he became a mega-figure in the world of horror and achieved celebrity across the generations thanks to his Famous Monsters of Filmland (1958-1983) and he was inducted into the Horror Hall of Fame in 1990. He was cultivated by the most successful directors of the 20th century and he had tribute walk-on parts in over 100 films.
Gone age 99, a victim of the Brown Slump. The company was founded at Utica, New York, in 1879 and the chain store empire arrived over here in Liverpool in 1909. Almost a century later, it was placed in the hands of administrators (last month), who took about a couple of weeks to decide they wouldn't find a buyer for the whole chain of 815 stores. So the stores are to be sold off piecemeal to Iceland, Sainsbury's and anyone else who will have them.
The actress who played Norah Batty in the eternal BBC 1 sitcom The Last of the Old Fellers has died at 80. Kathy Staff appeared in the very first episode in 1973. She was featured in a total of 243 episodes and had her final outing in August of this year. Her other TV roles included parts in Crossroad, Emmerdale Farm and Coronation Street on ITV, and appearances in Open All Hours with Ronnie Barker and David Jason on the Beeb.
What was once the biggest furniture retailer in the UK has fallen victim to the Brown Slump. Started in 1964 as a mail-order business, Mulland Furniture Industries blossomed into a chain of stores then lost ground to rivals. A stalled property market, the Brown Slump and a catastrophic drop in the demand for furniture finished MFI off.
The widow of Gene Roddenberry, the creator of Star Trek, has died at 76. A child actress, she worked in films and at the Desilu studios before being caught up in the Star Trek phenomenon. She was the bullet-proof first officer in the first pilot, but NBC insisted on giving that job to a man rather than the producer's (then) girlfriend.
He is suspected of swindles dating back to the 1970s and he was exposed to the US Securities & Exchange Committee in 1995 by an independent investigator. But all the SEC did was ask Mad Dog if he was a crook and believe him when he denied it.
This Nobel Prize-winning playwright, actor, director, author and writer of film scripts has died at 78. He became famous for writing plays with no beginning, middle & end, full of disjointed, naturalistic dialogue, which didn't necessarily say much, inexplicable expletives and trade-mark long pauses, during which the audience could wonder how long it would be before they could get to the bar. He took up political activism in his later years, and he was a particular opponent of smug bugger blair's illegal war in Iraq.
The Chancellor, a.k.a. 'im with the eyebrows, has caught Brown's Disease. Throwing £20 billion around on a Xmas spending spree isn't enough to make him feel better about the Brown Slump. So our squanderbug chancellor is going to borrow more even money and blow that, too, on trying to buy a labour win at the next general election.
Good money showering after bad
Nice work if you can get it
Loads of cash in, never any cash out
The alibis run out
Redress for rip-off
Doesn't the sod know there's a recession going on?
So that's what the money was for
Open an account with Barclays . . .
How is J. Woss making a crust after being suspended by the BBC without pay for obscene broadcasting? He seems to have a new career 'designing' crap Xmas wrapping paper for the Grauniad. His effort looks like a raid on a clip art collection for pictures of TVs.
Rip-off Britain Part 1
Rip-off Britain Part 2
You're right there, Gaffer!
All nit-pickers go M*A*D in the end!
Think before you vote!
Eager to offend
Our crumbling past
Bad intentions gone wrong
Blizzard Thursday, that's what the weather forecasters promised for the first week of the month. Huge snow drifts, gale-force winds and ice all over the place. In Romiley, we got rain. Lots of it, which washed away any snow and ice left over from earlier in the week and created the usual monster puddled on the pavements and roadsides. But at least the park didn't flood!
Romiley joins the general No!
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The EU denied it but everyone just knew that it would happen and lo! The Irish will have to hold another referendum on the EU constitution and vote the right way this time.
Grab, bloody grab
New Yorkers who are delayed by being messed about by the subway system can get the New York City Transit division to supply them with an alibi. A simple phone call will provide the traveller with a note confirming that the service didn't get the job done; subject to delays caused by the New York postal system. And NYCT is bringing in an online version to make the service speedier & cheaper.
Nothing like thinking big
Civilization's slide to anarchy
Things coming apart, part 2
Think before you speak!
Is your journey really necessary?
Air fares set to rocket?
The terrorist attacks in Bombay last month seem to have achieved the desired effect. Pakistan is abandoning all military operations against the bad guys in its badlands next to Afghanistan. The troops will be moved to Pakistan's border with India instead to do a lot of pointless posturing.
He picked the wrong side
Welcome back, Mr. President!
Oriental bad guys strike yet again
Freedom of speech? Not here, mate!
Another dirty deal done
The right weapon for the job!
No wonder everyone hates them
Hot on the heels of the flash-in-the-pan Lapland New Forest Experience's closure by Trading Standards officers, Lapland West Midlands has decided not to open after a Trading Standards experience.
Come to FRIDGELAND for your Xmas Break
Everyone knows that an old fridge gives kids hours of endless fun. Imagine how much fun your whole family could have in a mountain of them!
Book your ticket now. One-Person Ticket only £25.00 / €37.40 + + + Family Ticket £82.00 / €411.53 + + + PLUS NO VAT (because we don't believe in it)
NASA is inviting bids in the region of $42,000,000 for the surviving members of its space shuttle fleet Atlantis, Discovery and Endeavour, which will become redundant in time to become presents for Xmas of 2010.
The End of the World has been postponed until CERN spends £14,000,000 on repairing the magnets in its Large Hadron Collider. Once that has been done, they'll be able to run the gadget up to full speed and see if creates enough mini black holes to trash the planet.
Strangled with red tape
Putting the blame where it belongs
Stating the obvious, but why?
Pirates move in
Power versus popularity
|Created for Romiley Anarchists' League by workers in revolt against oppression.|
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