Back to Front PageLabour's plan is in place. They have a leader with policies which make him unelectable, they expect the Tory "bastards" to rebel against David Cameron's wimpy non-Tory adventures and tear the party to pieces so that Labour can triumph again at the proxy Second Coming of Tony B. Liar and new New Labour. Will it work, though?

Comrade Corbyn's Deadly Dozen?

  1. End austerity by taxing the rich more (so they leave the country and reduce the gap between rich and poor), attack tax evaders who don't support Labour but don't cut spending, which will necessitate borrowing on a scale which will make Gordon Brown look prudent after the rich have gone.

  2. Lots of qualitative easing to end povery, to destroy the value of the pound and savings, to fund public houses and transport, and to provide free internet for all.

  3. Ditch Trident and spend the £100 billion on doing favours for Labour's supporters to create a national feel-good factor.

  4. Unite Ireland by removing all the Unionists from Ulster in a forced migration to the mainland. Compensation will not be offered.

  5. Impose a national maximum wage to annoy rich parasites.

  6. All school children will be forced to learn to play an instrument, act or dance.

  7. Ban schools not under the control of a local council.

  8. Boycott everything to do with Israel until the Palestinians get the occupied territories back.

  9. Renationalize the railways and (sensibly) ditch H2S.

  10. Become the friend of even more left-wing dictators and terrorists so that after the armed forces are abolished, we will be everyone's friend and no one will attack us.

  11. Cancel anti-terror laws (which will be unnecessary after policy 10 is in effect) and don't sent Labour supporters to gaol to prevent prison overcrowding.

  12. Get out of NATO and (sensibly) the EU.

Don't say you haven't been warned!
 

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